Light, Love, Hope

Light in the Darkness Surrounded by Love with Hope for those in need.

Shirley

Shirley is the proud mother of two beautiful young ladies. She enjoys spending time with them on their ranch in the deep South with their three paint horses. Always looking for an adventure, she looks forward to hikes in the mountains chasing waterfalls, or scouring the coast for beautiful lighthouses! Shirley writes to encourage others and often times shares things that motivate and inspire her. She believes in living life to the fullest because no one is promised the gift of another day. Join her as we honor our bodies, minds, hearts, souls, and our Almighty Creator, God above!

8 Comments

  1. aimee fauci
    May 21, 2014 @ 12:07 pm

    I think I listen too much sometimes… I feel like I am a people pleaser and problem solver. I think I listen and ask questions pertaining to their topic so I can really understand and even if they are not asking me to solve the problem.. I feel like I need to. Like the man at the market.. I am reading your post thinking… Why did that checker not call C/S and have someone call for him… See… I’m a problem solver…

    Reply

    • Gregory
      May 21, 2014 @ 9:39 pm

      Aimee you brought up something that I did think about when writing the post. I too think I listen too much at times. When I was standing there listening to the conversation at the market, I was thinking along the same lines as you. The clerk could have made the call and let him talk to the main office right at that moment.

      Thanks for the reply,

      Gregory
      ~The Quiet Computer Guy

      Reply

  2. Alli
    May 21, 2014 @ 3:47 pm

    You are so right! People don’t listen mainly because they are too busy talking. When my pastor husband and I counsel with people, a lot of the time they never shut up long enough for us to try and help them, so we just let them talk on and on and then at the end of the session they talk about how much we helped them. And we barely said a word.

    I’m sure I’m been guilty of not listening myself, so thanks for the reminder to hush up and listen more. Great post!

    Reply

    • Gregory
      May 21, 2014 @ 9:46 pm

      Alli, thanks for the reply. I can relate a bit to what you are saying as I am a part-time faculty member at our local community college. I get students that act just like you have described. They will come to me for help and they end up talking the whole time. Usually, they will say the same thing you hear. Yet I barely said anything to help the with their issue.

      Gregory
      The Quiet Computer Guy

      Reply

  3. Alvina Castro
    May 21, 2014 @ 8:49 pm

    I have to admit I am a really bad listener. This is something I really need to work on so that i dont miss out on importnant things

    Reply

    • Gregory
      May 21, 2014 @ 9:42 pm

      Alvina many years ago, too many that I care to mention, I was that way. I was always quiet and didn’t say much, but I really didn’t listen either. It was something that I had to force myself to change about myself. I am glad I did as I have really discovered a lot of beautiful things about people I would never have noticed before.

      Gregory,
      ~The Quite Computer Guy

      Reply

  4. Tamela
    May 22, 2014 @ 3:09 pm

    As someone with mainly manic-based bipolar, it is a learned thing today to listen and not have my head whirling with thoughts of how to answer before the person has even stopped talking! If I don’t allow them to finish before I come up with a response, well, I’m shutting them off in order to “help” them when all they may need is a shoulder to lean on.

    While I hold dear and blessed the therapy I undertook to learn to be a better person in the world, I also know that I learned a GREAT deal about listening – really listening – as an undergraduate journalism student. Any journalist who’s good learns early, as The Quiet Guy suggests, that some of the greatest and best moments and sayings and information come when I keep my mouth shut and let the other person say what they need to say. While I am probably guilty of “listening too much” – I also feel that God has given each of us the gift of discernment and if used wisely, can save ones behind if one truly listens to a person’s message instead of analyzing how to correctly respond…well, we each have the ability to reign in our thoughts IF we so desire.

    I live in Arizona near the Navajo reservation for many years. I learned a great deal from the Navajos about communication. The Navajo believe it is quite discourteous to interrupt a person speaking and they will reserve comment for some time after a person speaks just to make sure the person has said all they need to say. Navajos feel no rush to respond; they are thoughtful and caring in their responses having waited a moment to digest the information and to respond appropriately. I wish we all could have been taught from birth that this form of peaceful, quiet, thoughtful listening served mankind very well in dealing with their fellow men.

    I had to chuckle at the grocery store incident as I recently went through an exactly similar situation with my “fuel points” rewards. I’d have some one day and while neither my husband or I put gas in our vehicles, the points would bounce around and come time for us to use them, the points had again magically disappeared. I asked the gas attendant what was going on and she gave me a phone number to call. I said “thank you” and left. The first call didn’t go so well because I, me, wasn’t getting the answer I wanted – which was basically why is someone else able to have my phone number on their account and yet I’ve been paying the bill for that number for seven years? The answer was not appreciated, “Our system has no means of taking a phone number off a card unless the customer with the number contacts them to change it.” Nope, didn’t handle that phone call well at all. I did call back after my husband had picked up a new card to be completed and spoke with a very kind lady who got that I wasn’t happy with their “system” but knew that she and I had to work around it to accommodate my needs. As the gas attendant had said, this customer service clerk helped me find solutions that the first gentlemen denied were even possible. SHE listened to ME, the first clerk had not and just said NO to everything. With the assistance of someone who actually listened and agreed that this was a big problem for them, I got my issue solved; with extra bonus fuel points to “make up” for the ones we’d lost over the years. I did listen to the gas attendant first; didn’t get upset, just followed her suggestions and in the end it all worked out. Sometimes that “listening” thing needs to go both ways as when you DON’T feel heard, I admit it’s an annoying moment for me!!

    Thank you for sharing!

    Reply

    • Gregory
      May 24, 2014 @ 9:08 pm

      Tamela, thanks for the reply. It sounds link I could learn quite a bit from the Navajo’s about listening. Sometimes I tend to blurt things out when I just need to sit back, keep my mouth shut and wait to comment.

      Gregory
      ~The Quiet Computer Guy

      Reply

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