It’s been a while since I’ve felt inspired enough to write. Losing my mother-in-law in April took a toll on us all. Having to see her in her final days and moments in the shape she was in was extremely hard, but it was worth it because we were there with her. Even in what appeared to be a comatose state, I feel she knew we were all gathered around her; stroking her hair, holding her hand.
Life does not go back to normal after a loss such as this. It changes people. Some people struggle to the point that it brings out all the bad within them, while others grieve silently, unable to visit her gravesite or take flowers.
My family and I took flowers to my mother-in-law while she was in the hospital. We wanted her to see the beauty of each rose petal and appreciate the fragrance that filled the room right then, while she still could. I did the same with my sister before her passing as well. Fresh bouqets of flowers brought a smile, even if only for a short while amongst the pain they were facing, both in their different ways.
So many times, we’d take granola and fruit parfaits to her bedside to encourage her to eat, even if it was just a few spoonfulls. Now it’s hard to see a parfait because those thoughts come flooding in.
Yet, in the end, it was all worth it.
Each small gesture was appreciated and greeted by a weak smile from my mother-in-law. In her sweet, soft voice, she’d say, “You didn’t have to do that …” but our hearts desired to do that and more for her. If only our love could have cured her, as she had an army of love warriors surrounding her.
It’s still hard two months later. My husband is the one that cannot bring himself to visit his mother’s grave. I’ve offered to take flowers and be right there with him when he goes, but he can’t at this point. Understandably so.
We wonder some times if our efforts matter. I’m here to tell you that they do. Each and every kind gesture, the smallest act of kindness, matters more than you can imagine.
… And is worth it.
People are worth it.
So love with all your might. Extend your heart to others, even the ones that harbor hatred in theirs. The battle isn’t with you. It is the demons inside of them. Continue to put on the armor of God and show love in all your ways.
In the end, it is worth it to touch a heart, a life, a soul.