How many of us would willingly admit that we are approval addicts? Let’s be honest with each other. Do we seek to please others and have them place their stamp of approval on our choices, our lives … on us, in general? If so, we can be referred to as “People Pleasers” or called “Approval Addicts.” I know. I have been there, and if I am completely honest, I am there right this very minute as I tap these words out on the computer … hoping that you’ll approve of my site, that you’ll like my writings and you’ll come back to visit. I am seeking to please you and to have you approve of me … right … this … very … minute.
We ALL want approval. We attempt to please people and hope to “fit in” with them. We all want people to like us, and it hurts when people reject us, don’t welcome us with open arms, or say bad things about us. It is hard to not have the approval that we seek from others around us and to not be included. But, the truth is that we do not need the approval of others because we already have the approval of the only one that really, truly matters any way – God Almighty. Believe me, I have struggled with this very thing. I know how hard it is to break the cycle and accept yourself, accept where you are, accept your walk, and accept, most importantly, that you do NOT need to seek to get from others what GOD freely gives us! We have His approval. We have His love. If God is for us, who could possibly be against us?
There will certainly be people in this life that won’t be on our side. They won’t like us, and they won’t include us. We will be rejected more times than we care to remember or than we can keep up with. It’s just a fact of life. Don’t lose hope, though, and don’t stop putting yourself out there.
For my daughters, as well as any child, teenager, mother, sister, daughter, friend. Hear me now. This one is for all of you girls out there. As the world tries to tear at your self confidence and self esteem, may you always know that the only approval you truly need is from God above! And, you are already preapproved. Praise God Almighty!
I actually have two books that go along with this on seeking approval. The first is Love Idol: Letting Go of Your Need for Approval – and Seeing Yourself through God’s Eyes and the second is
Approval Addiction: Overcoming Your Need to Please Everyone . I highly recommend them both!
No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD. King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)
True freedom never comes until we fully realize that we don’t need to struggle to get from man what God freely gives us: love, acceptance, approval, security, worth, and value. ~Joyce Meyer~
Judgment and criticism never bring joy. Showing love does. The choice is yours. ~Joyce Meyer Ministries
Here’s to my girls. May they always know that they are already preapproved by God above!
Living for An audience of one <3 It's not always easy, but it's what I strive for!
Absolutely, Renee! I have just recently said those very words to my daughters. All that truly matters is your audience of One!
Nice blog. It is so important to love oneself. Without self-love first, people will turn to desperation and nothing good can come out of something so negative.
Thank you, Tami. That is so true about self-love. One can have such confidence and high self esteem until they are told repeatedly that they aren’t good enough, no one will ever want them, etc. Once a person hears it, those words are hard to shake. If they hear it on a regular basis, it does such damage to them. They begin to lose confidence and their self esteem is lowered with every harsh word spoken against them. I lived it at the hands of others that took great pleasure in tearing me down every chance they got. I resisted a great deal at first, but again, after hearing it repeatedly, it does something to a person. Now, though, I realize that hurting people HURT people … and the person that did this to me was hurting a great deal. It does not excuse it by any means, but it helps me to develop a clearer understanding of the abuse … because that’s what it was. It takes a great deal of time to heal after such treatment. That is why I am trying to support, encourage, uplift, and love on as many people as I can through the words “spoken” here. Also, I do not want my two daughters to EVER go through what I’ve gone through. I build them up as much as possible so that they know without a shadow of a doubt that they are loved, treasured, cherished and already approved … by me … and God above! Thank you for stopping by!