The Story of Us
Today marks our 14th wedding anniversary.
As I reflect back on “the chase,” when he “captured me,” and when we settled into life as a family, I also realize I’ve learned a few things along the way.
I’ll get into the story of us in a moment, but allow me to speak of the knowledge I’ve gained in these past 14 years.
There are rather bold people in this world who will look you in the eye and say things purposely to hurt you. They will refuse to attend your wedding claiming they do not support your union, meanwhile they secretly wish to see you continue to struggle in life. These people are not your friends if they rejoice in your suffering and ridicule you when your heart has finally found happiness.
I’ve learned that people will not always be on your side. They will not always support your decisions. Things will come along in life that shake your foundation and threaten to rip your heart open to the very core. Some people will help you gather broken, shattered pieces now scattered all around as your heart faces the biggest house-leveling tornado you never saw coming. Having no way to prepare, all you can do in the aftermath is find the will to keep breathing in and moving on.
There will be those that pretend to your face to be your best friend with only the best intentions at heart, yet they will turn slowly from you to tell your business to any one that will listen speaking things you trusted to only them. They will take your trusting heart and betray you time and time again, knowing your forgiving heart will grant them forgiveness once more in the end. While I may, indeed, our friendship will never be the same again.
And sadly, there will be those attempting to place a wedge between you and your spouse. Old hurts are often revisited and brought back up as a way to taint your marriage, yet you’ve long moved on from that place they still continue to take you back to time and time again.
For all those not in favor of my life choices, there are plenty of others cheering me on, kneeling down in prayer each night and asking God to continue to bless our family and our union.
And with that said, I’ll continue with the brief story of us.
Our story isn’t the traditional one where we met, fell in love immediately, and couldn’t wait to get married, though. This boy worked HARD to win me over! For two years, he chased after me. Having gone through a really bad divorce, I was NOT interested whatsoever in anyone at that point. I was actually anti-man for a while (except for my daddy). But, this fellow kept calling, periodically sending flowers to my work, cards in the mail, etc. I remember telling my parents about it and asking, “WHY won’t he stop?” My dad said, “He’s persistent, you have to give him that. Besides, he knows a good thing when he sees it.” My mom, smiling so innocently, looked over at me and said, “You’re going to marry him one day.” Me? Marry HIM? Never!!! HA!
It wasn’t until he asked me to listen to Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls that everything changed. Quite disturbed at his request at first, I did finally give in and listened to the words of the song. There is a part in there that says, “I just want you to know who I am …” and then I realized I truly hadn’t given him a chance at all. Well, that moment in time changed all of that. Right then and there, my heart started to shift more favorably in his direction.
We dated for two years before we got married, so all total it’s been 18 years of craziness. We’ve had our good times, as well as our bad, like EVERY couple does (and if you say you haven’t gone through anything in your married life, you’re lying because everyone does whether they want to admit it or not). Through it all, we’ve held on to each other, and we have been so very proud of the two daughters we have raised. God has richly blessed us, and we are so grateful.
He stepped into the role of being Nicole’s father without hesitation when her real father stepped out. We started our lives together as a family, even including her in our wedding ceremony, presenting her with a necklace at a certain point in the wedding. It was truly a precious moment that will forever be etched into my mind when he got down on one knee and placed a sparkling ballerine necklace around her little neck. And before he stood back up, she reached her little angel arms around his neck, as she stood on her tippy toes, and hugged him tightly. We were united and presented to our guests not as husband and wife but as a family. 
♥ And, what do you know? My mama was right after all!
A few years later, we were blessed with another daughter, who is also the light of our lives. When I tell you that she is my miracle baby, believe it, because she truly is. Only God knows what all I went through to have her, but it was worth it and so much more. She has blessed my heart and my life, and I sit in tears as I think of my two beautiful baby girls who are my life, my heart, and my soul. Oh thank you, God.
Our union has been blessed, and through all the struggles and trials that we’ve faced, we’re still together. We’re still going strong, and he’s still the one I love.
It doesn’t seem like a grand total of 18 years together, but I sure hope God blesses us with many, many more years of living, loving, and laughing together. I want to hold his hand when I’m 85 years old and say, “We made it, baby.”
As you have read, the majority of my post today has spoken of the good in my husband of 14 years. I have chosen to look past the flaws and things he may have done to hurt me or let me down during our total of 18 years together. I have, instead, focused on the things that bring a smile to my face and continue to warm my heart to this very day. It’s a decision, really. For you see, I am not perfect either. I have flaws and imperfections, too. There are times I’ve hurt my beloved. Yet, it is my hope that he continues to look past those times and celebrate the love we have in our hearts and that which is reflected back to us in the faces of our two beautiful daughters. When the times got tough, as they do in every marriage, we chose to keep our family together because of those bright blue eyes of both of our daughters. While some would have given up when the waters of marriage became rough, we knew our girls were watching to see how we’d handle difficult situations we were forced to face. We chose to weather the storms of life and stay together. I can say with all honesty and sincerity, God is the glue that held our family together.
Hurricane Matthew
“Daddy, have you been keeping up with the storm?” I asked.
“No, not really. Why? Should I?” He replied with little concern in his voice.
“Yes! Hurricane Matthew is going to impact South Carolina. They’re saying it’s going to be like Hurricane Hugo was for us back in 1989.” I said, trying not to be an alarmist, but hoping he’d see the seriousness of this approaching storm!
“I haven’t really been watching it. I just have a peace about it, and I don’t think it will be that bad.” He said, in the calmest tone ever.
This was a conversation I had with my daddy two days prior to Hurricane Matthew pounding South Carolina’s coast. While we’re not right on the coast, I knew from the news reports that we would be affected in our area.
Taking a moment to reflect back on Hurricane Hugo, I remember feeling nervous and anxious in 1989 with the threat of a hurricane approaching. We boarded windows on our blue house and rode it out that night. At the time, we lived in a block house, so we did not fear damage to our structure so much. With windows boarded, we prayed no trees would fall on the roof as we tried to steal a few hours of sleep. We awoke to downed trees, but we were spared a huge amount of damage, unlike others in our area. I remember doing yard clean up work when one of my former classmates drove up in our yard. My face flushed with embarrassment as they giggled at me, but without lights or water, there was no way to shower. I tried the best I could to look presentable, but there was no denying my less than perfect appearance with hair tossed around and no makeup.
Fast forward 27 years that really sailed by way too fast for my liking, and the same nervousness and anxiousness resurfaced as Hurricane Matthew changed course. I knew then, without a shadow of a doubt, we would feel the affects of this hurricane further inland.
Bracing ourselves for the worst, we filled all of our vehicles with gas just in case we needed to join the mass of others evacuating. We consulted with some of our horse friends in the area, but they thought our horses would be fine in our pasture instead of finding a facility elsewhere to house them until the threat of the storm was over. As the rain started, we were under the shelter tagging our horses with ribbons braided in their manes bearing our names and phone numbers just in case our fence got damaged in the storm and our horses got out. Tears filled my eyes at the thought, but I forced them back so as not to upset my children who were helping us.
Arming ourselves with food, water, flashlights, and ensuring the RV was positioned out of harm’s way, we prayed as Hurricane Matthew drew nearer. Sleep was scarce as the wind and rain slowly began tapping on our windows at first, then became more forceful as it beat angrily on the side of the house and roof so strongly at certain points we felt it would surely burst right through our wooden structure. Thoughts of the big bad wolf from my childhood days ran through my mind as the wind threatened to huff, and puff, and blow my little white house in the country down completely. I forced those thoughts right out of my head and began praying to God instead! As I tiptoed down the hall in the wee morning hours and began to peer out of the living room window, I prayed over the two trees way too close to the front of my house for my liking at that point in time. When once I admired those tall, strong trees, they now became a threat to me as if one fell with the force of the wind, I feared it would land directly on my living room and garage. More upsetting was the thought of the other falling across my children’s rooms. They swirled and swayed back and forth, and at other times looked like someone was shaking them viciously as they were tossed to and fro by the relentless wind. I had a long conversation with God concerning those rather large trees and pleaded with Him for protection over our family. Suddenly, our lights began to flicker, then went completely out leaving us in utter darkness alone with the big bad wolf still beating on our door with this feeling of impending doom deep inside of us.
When daylight began to break through leaving the night sky and my fears behind, I ventured outside to check on the horses. Tears stung my eyes as I found them huddled together under their shelter. The one pony they always seem to leave out in the rain was tucked under the shelter, too. It was as if the other horses had compassion and said, “Okay, little one, you can join us. We do love you, even if we don’t always show it.”
As the rain and wind subsided, we gathered our belongings and headed to the RV. We realized during the previous ice storms we’ve had that our area will be one of the very last with power restored, unfortunately. Having just purchased this Class A Fleetwood Flair RV in March, I whispered prayers of thanks to God for us making the right decision with this purchase! I’ll never forget how we went back and forth until we finally decided it would be a wise move, and this past weekend certainly proved that to be true. We were able to fire up the generator and live in comfort for short periods of time, in an effort to conserve gas. With the water tank completely full and LP gas on board, we were able to have hot showers, too!
Being without power forced us to put down our cell phones more since battery life was so precious, it seemed. Since we were not able to watch television, we were outside together watching our horses graze while my youngest daughter rode her bike. While it seems like a hardship, it makes you spend time with your family that you really should be spending with them any way! I think even after the storm and this timely reminder, we should make more of an effort to put down our phones and turn off our televisions to really get to know our family members again!
When we ventured out in our neighborhood, it didn’t take long for us to realize why we were still without power.
As we drove cautiously around the curve, it almost seemed like more trees were down than standing! Sadly, as we approached a group of homes, we noticed a tall pine tree uprooted and laying over on a house.
Transformers were snatched from the ground and power lines from their poles.
And there stood my sweet friend in her yard. We stopped immediately when we recognized her and asked if everyone was okay. She replied that they were, all things considered. She had tarps inside to protect her belongings, but that was all they could do at that point. We were just thankful to hear that no one got hurt and no lives were lost when the tree fell on their house.
After leaving my friend’s house, I thought of another dear friend I hadn’t heard from. With urgency in my voice, I asked my husband to drive to our friend’s house. Night was falling again by the time we found the driveway. We pulled in and searched for their vehicles, but none could be found. We were hopeful that they evacuated and were in a safer area. As we drove home, I whispered a silent prayer for their safety! And … thankfully, the very next day, they sent us a message that all was well. They were without power, and their phones were not charged to reach out to anyone until that point in time. They assured us that we were the first ones they notified of their safety. Oh, thank God for answered prayer! Our friends were safe!
As far as my parents, they never left their house the entire time … and, miraculously, they never lost power! While my dad didn’t get a bit of sleep Friday night into Saturday morning, my mother slept right through the entire thing.
There’s just something about having peace in the mist of the storm. And, there’s something, also, to be said for heeding the warnings and preparing in advance “just in case.”
We’re thankful for another day, and we pray our electricity will be restored soon. As we wait, we realize how fortunate we are in only having a few downed trees in the back of our property. How fortunate we have been! Thank you, God. Sadly, others in our area, especially along the coast, weren’t so lucky.
There is a lesson to be learned by Hurricane Matthew. All week long at work, we had The Weather Channel going as we watched as they tracked this storm. As it approached landfall, it shifted and came further inland than first anticipated. Governor Nikki Haley was begging and pleading with fellow South Carolinians to evacuate and flee their homes. People rushed to the grocery stores to stock up on supplies as Hurricane Matthew drew nearer.
What if we all saw the urgency in getting our hearts and lives right with God before He comes back? What if we watched, prayed, and prepared for the second coming of the Lord like all who had their eyes glued to the news watching the weather? What if we got down on our knees and begged God for forgiveness and hid scriptures away in our hearts? Then we could be like my father with peace in our hearts not fearing what was to come.
It’s definitely something to ponder.
History In The Making
Technology is a wonderful thing, and Saturday night, we watched history in the making thanks to how far we’ve advanced with technology in this day and age.
If you’ve been a fan of this page for long, you know of our love for the Morris Island Lighthouse. Engineers got together with the help of SCE&G to delight all of the lovers of this lighthouse. By pressing a button on their cell phone, this lighthouse lit up once again after being out of commission for many, many years. Solar panels were placed on the lighthouse along with batteries to make this moment in history one we shall never forget as long as we live.
It has long been a dream of mine to walk the wrought iron steps of this magnificent lighthouse. While that dream may not become a reality any time in the near future, I still hold on to it like so many others in attendance that night.
A rather large crowd gathered along the sandy shores to share in this moment in time. A ceremony was held with various speakers from the Save The Light organization, to the mayor, as well as a grandmother who donated $250,000 in memory of her granddaughter who passed away in 2014 as a result of an automobile accident. With music playing, the crowd took pictures, enjoyed a slice of cake celebrating the 140th birthday of the Morris Island Lighthouse, and waited anxiously for this beacon of light to come to life at exactly 7:30 p.m. Saturday night. Sitting on the large rocks lining the beach with the waves crashing below our feet, we stared out across the ocean as a tiny light appeared at first and slowly turned toward us to reveal a beam of light that cut through the darkness. As this beacon of light illuminated the night sky, we watched in amazement and wonder completely thrilled to be a part of this moment in history!
Sadly, the lighthouse only remained lit by solar power for four hours Saturday night. That is the maximum allotted time the coast guard could give to this organization. When we realized earlier in the week that it would not remain lit, we knew we had to do everything within our power to ensure we were among the crowd gathered for this event. My heart danced as I watched the light from this tall tower of hope.
Among those in attendance were a couple who got married at the top of the lighthouse in the 1980s. They drove from Wilmington, North Carolina to be there for the lighting. As I listened to the speaker talk of how they walked the steps and got married at the very top, I couldn’t help but wonder what the pictures must’ve looked like from back then. Oh how I wish I could have seen a glimpse into the lighthouse when the steps were in much better shape to allow climbing to the very top. I can only image the breathtaking view of the island from up there!
My mind quickly shifted to the lady before me in the wheelchair. With her white hair blowing with the slight breeze coming off of the ocean, the gentleman attempted to push her through the white sand that seemed to match her hair. I was extremely impressed when the gentleman finally spoke and said she was 95 years old. It was her heart’s desire to be present for this event, and she was well pleased as evident by the smile stretched across her thin, pale lips.
How meaningful this night was for so many of us, and it is one I’ll never forget. It provided hope for all that one day this lighthouse will be preserved and restored completely.
