Life Changing Moment
We stood in the doorway moments earlier laughing and joking.
As the laughter fades and the silence takes over for a moment, he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his wallet. Standing next to him, I watch as his index finger and thumb fish for a card in the small leather pocket on the inside. As he retrieved the card, he turns it toward me so I can read it.
“South Carolina Oncology Associates.”
There I stood staring down at this business card in between his fingers in this life changing moment.
I felt anger wash over me instantly.
Never glancing up from the card, I blurt out, “What?!”
Silence followed.
Trying to be strong, I looked up as his eyes met mine. Feeling tears welling up inside of me, I could only manage one word, “Who?”
His head tilted to the side as he says, “Me.”
I fall into his strong arms as he hugs me close to him, tears falling like rain.
Feeling as if someone wrapped their fingers around my throat cutting off my air supply, I’m only able to whisper these words:
“I don’t want to lose you.”
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Please, each and every one that reads this … say a special healing prayer for this gentleman as he begins treatment. God is the Almighty Physician. We are trusting in Him.
19“Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask,
it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.
20“For where two or three have gathered together in My name,
I am there in their midst.”
Matthew 18:19-20
Tragedy Struck
While we were away this weekend on a mini horseback riding adventure, my daughter called with such urgency in her voice.
Tragedy struck once again.
First, she informed us of Christina Grimmie’s murder after the concert in Orlando, Florida.
My daughter learned of Christina first from being You Tube famous, then appearing on The Voice. My family and I used to gather around the television on Monday nights to watch the women and men compete. This is such a sad and tragic loss.
The very next day, my daughter called again fed up, frustrated, and scared asking, “What is this world coming to?”
More tragedy struck in Orlando, Florida at a gay club leaving 50 dead and 53 wounded.
A hate crime.
Oh, dear God!
Tonight I shared something on Facebook that said, “If your religion requires you to hate people, then you need another religion!” Immediately two people liked it within seconds of it being shared. It is the TRUTH, though!
I have heard the argument and have seen my share of Christians that have zero tolerance for homosexuals. They take the bible and all but beat people with it, as if THEY, themselves, are without sin. Why condemn people just because they sin differently? Here’s a news flash for you – there is not a single person among us that is without sin. NO ONE can sit on their high horse and honestly say that they don’t have some form of sin in their lives. Whether they lie, cheat, steal, are gay/lesbian, overeat, drink too much, do illegal drugs or abuse prescription drugs, hide in darkness with pornography, gossip, allow jealousy to consume them – the list of sins goes on and on. We just sin differently! Therefore, who are WE to cast stones at others around us?
As Christians, we are to hate the sin but LOVE the sinner. There is far too much hate in this world and too many hate crimes as a result of it! This madness needs to STOP!
Would you turn your back on your son or daughter if they came in one day and announced that they were gay? I would hope that you wouldn’t. This child is STILL YOUR CHILD no matter what they reveal to you. You loved them from the moment you first found out you were pregnant with them, so why would you dare turn your back on them just because they announced they had a different sexual preference than you? You are still called to LOVE them! They are your flesh and blood – they were moments before revealing this to you and they STILL ARE afterwards, too!
Just a few short years ago, my daughter “tested” me on this very subject. She came into the room and said she needed to talk to me. I stopped what I was doing, sat down across from her at the table, and gave her my full attention. She hesitated before going on but proceeded to informed me that she was a lesbian. I looked her straight in the face and replied, “Okay … and? What did you have to tell me?” She looked puzzled, paused and then halfway questioned, “Mom?” I never took my eyes off of her as she asked, “That’s it? You aren’t going to say anything about what I just told you? You’re not mad? You don’t hate me?” I took it all in, but I did not hesitate one second before I responded, “I love you no matter what – my love for you is unconditional. Period!” She stared back at me from across the table in disbelief. Then she said she was only trying to see what my reaction would be – she WASN’T a lesbian after all – she just wanted to see if I would react like her friend’s parents had reacted when they found out about their daughter. From what my daughter said, the parents threatened to disown their daughter. What a truly sad situation! Apparently, though, I passed my daughter’s little “test” with flying colors and left her almost speechless in the process. She came back to this subject matter a little while later, still in disbelief of my response, so I took that opportunity once again to tell her that there is not anything in the world that she can ever do that will cause me to turn away from her or make me love her any less. I am her mother. I may not like some of her choices in life, but regardless, I love her unconditionally. I always have, and I always will.
I had several friends that “came out” to reveal that they are lesbians just a few years ago. They weren’t kidding around or testing the waters, though. One was a massage therapist that I used to go to for quite a few years, actually. She changed locations, and I was trying to save money so I stopped going as frequently as I once had for massages. She feared that I had learned the “truth” about her and that caused me to run in the opposite direction, which couldn’t have been further from the real reason why I hadn’t been in for a massage. She called me one day to ask if anyone had said anything about her to me, but they hadn’t. She took that time to reveal that she was a lesbian and was afraid I stopped coming in for massages for that reason. Honestly, it didn’t surprise me, but it didn’t stop me from going in later for a massage either. As long as she didn’t try anything with me, I was fine with it. It is her life and her choice. It does not affect me whatsoever.
Shortly after this, I had another friend reveal to me that they, too, were a lesbian. They chose to tell me in an email. I read it, and then responded back to them like I normally would have. This did not cause me to treat them any differently. Their sexual preference is just that – their own. As long as they are not hitting on me and as long as they respect ME, I do not have a problem with them.
You see, in all of the above situations where people “revealed” things to me, I did not get all homophobic and start condemning people. It isn’t my place. While their preferences aren’t that of my own, I can still respect them as individuals. We were friends before, and we are still friends after! They trusted me enough to come to me and share with me. What type of person would I be if I started acting hateful toward them and shunning them? I can hate the sin but still love the sinner, and that is exactly what I have displayed for my daughter, her friends, and my own friends that came out about their sexual preferences.
I realize that everyone is different and no two people will have the same exact reaction. What I don’t get is people purposely setting out to HURT other people just because they are different!
While we’re not sure of a motive in Christina Grimmie’s case, it is quite clear why the shooter went into that gay nightclub. He hated homosexuals, and he wanted to do away with them. There they were having a night out on the town laughing, dancing, and just enjoying life. In walks the gunman and starts claiming lives left and right. Shots were fired, people were held hostage from what I’m hearing on the news, and people texted their loved ones that they were going to die. I just read this a few minutes ago, and it hurts my heart so much. I remember seeing a mother on the news, crying … almost begging for her son to come forth as she hadn’t heard from him. He was her only child, I remember her saying through her tears.
Why?
WHY must these types of things continue to happen?
Why are innocent lives being taken?
I do not understand why human lives are NOT valued in this day and age!
This young man deserved to LIVE just like all the others in the nightclub! No matter what their sexual preferences are – THEY DESERVED TO LIVE!
We need to get down on our knees and pray for this nation as a whole. Black – White – Hispanic – Straight – Gay/Lesbian – Transgender – Baptist – Methodist – Catholic – Non-Denominational – You get the idea! It doesn’t matter WHAT or WHO you are – EVERY SINGLE LIFE is important and should be valued!
We are all different – YES – but we all deserve to LIVE!
When will it end? The senseless shootings? The lives that are lost?
Each person on this planet has worth and value. They deserve to live! They need love, compassion, and kindness!
Each and every one!
Heart’s Desire
This little prayer sits in my kitchen window propped up against a stained glass lighthouse. Immediately to the right of the lighthouse are a few small plants that fit perfectly in that space. I purposely positioned them there to bring joy when I wash my hands at the kitchen sink. They are also there to greet me as I gaze out that window at the hummingbirds visiting my feeder. Tucked inside one of the green plants is a small mauve, white, and green hummingbird just in case I don’t see one fluttering around outside. While these things lining my window seal aren’t much, they bring a smile to my face and lighten my mood every time I see them.
While I didn’t write this prayer, it spoke to my heart when I first read it. I’m actually not sure where it originated from, but for some reason I seem to recall it possibly being tucked in the St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital envelope. We try to donate to them every year. They are so kind to send little surprises such as address labels, note pads, and it just seems like it would “fit” that this little prayer was included. They also send personal stories of children that have been receiving treatment. Their stories break my heart as I recall a time when a sixth grade girl in my daughter’s class was diagnosed with cancer. My daughter was so overcome with sadness when she heard the news, and it was her heart’s desire to help her friend. We set out, along with Greg Johnson who handles all things behind the scenes with Light Love Hope, to do just that. Our efforts were successful and helped provide for her mother while she took off time from work to care for her child. Her story has a happy ending, as she just graduated from high school last weekend. Her treatment set her back a year on her school work, so she graduated a year behind my daughter. She has been in remission for several years now. This young lady is a walking miracle and a prime example of God’s healing power!
Ah, but back to where this prayer possibly originated from.
Perhaps it was included in literature that our neighbor, Ms. Betty, passed along to us. She likes to recycle things that she receives in the mail. Her heart is in the right place as she shares Journey magazines, calendars, and sometimes even books. The latest little booklets she placed in a yellow envelope inside my mailbox were about how to get to know Jesus. One book in particular asks on the cover, “Do You Know Jesus?” Yes! We do!
No matter where this little prayer came from, it echoes my heart’s desire.
How often do we stop to thank God for our many blessings? Oh, how wonderful it would be if we only stop for a moment, in between the muttering and complaining that we get in a habit of doing, and consider all that He has done for us. He has provided for our every need, and He will not fail. No matter what, God is an ever present force in our lives longing for a relationship with us. He cares for the tiniest sparrow. His love and care for us is even greater.
What if we were to strive daily to have a positive outlook? No one will want what we have if we’re negative and down in the dumps all the time. We want people to see the Jesus in us so that they will long for what we have and begin to ask questions. Then it will open up the conversation for us to share about our Lord and Savior! I think of the lady’s video that went viral recently — the mom wearing the Chewbacca mask and how she just laughed and laughed over how she looked in the mirror. She was so joyful that everyone was watching and sharing her video all around the globe. When asked about her joyfulness, she took that opportunity to share in her “15 minutes of fame” that her joy comes from the Lord. Oh, what a wonderful opportunity to share about our Jesus, and she did just that! That is what I’m talking about – to be so filled that people ask what is the source of your joy … and our reply should be, “Jesus Christ!”
Let every single thing that we say and do bring honor, praise, and glory to Jesus.
Indeed.
May this be your heart’s desire as well.
