Light, Love, Hope

Yesterday was Mother’s Day.  It was a day honoring mothers every where.   That includes YOU, dear mother that is reading this that often times feels like everyone else gets honored on “that” day but you.

I have been there.

There was once a time when I felt like I was lost in the shuffle on Mother’s Day.  The festivities fell on my shoulders … to make sure my mom felt special, to make sure my grandmother felt special, too, and let’s not forget that I also had to make sure that my mother-in-law felt special as well.  I was the one that people looked to and expected something to be done to “celebrate” the mothers in the family.  Yet, I was and am a mother myself, so who was supposed to celebrate … ME?

At one time, I felt selfish for these thoughts.  Not any more.

I AM a mother, and I DO deserve to be treated special.  Not just on one day a year, though.  Yes, mothers get special recognition on that day for all that they do.  But, I hope you’re showing your mother or the mother of your children DAILY how special they are and how much you appreciate and love them.  They work long hours with little recognition for all that they DO.  As the saying goes, “A mother’s work is never done.”  It seems like that, doesn’t it with the endless pile of laundry that seems to breed and multiply in the laundry room and clothes hampers!

But, yes, at one point I felt selfish for wondering who was to celebrate me and how long did I have to “mother” to qualify for someone celebrating me.

I finally decided that my husband was perfectly capable of celebrating the woman that brought him into this world and raised him.  I no longer needed to carry the weight of this on my shoulders to do things “just right” to celebrate her.  She wasn’t my mother.  Oh that is not going to come off nice to some of my readers, but I inherited her when I married him.  Whether he celebrated her in years past and how, he did without me then … so if he wishes to celebrate her now, he can still do that without my help.   No, I don’t harbor any ill feelings toward his mother at all.  Please don’t read that into this.  But, she was one of the ones that didn’t really celebrate me.  Finally, she did start mailing me a card, which I appreciate.  It took YEARS for me to “qualify” to be a recipient of a card from her, although I am the mother of her 10 year old granddaughter in addition to her 18 year old step granddaughter.  Yes, I think I more than qualify for someone to celebrate me instead of me always being the one to celebrate everyone else and make sure they feel special on Mother’s Day.

Although my late grandmother would come to Mother’s Day dinner at my house along with my parents, my grandma didn’t celebrate me either.  I always had her a present when she came, and I made sure to recognize her.  I just did not “qualify” to receive recognition from her, I suppose, although I’ve been a mother for the past 18 years.

My parents, though, they ALWAYS celebrated me.  I was recognized by my dad, especially, and I am so thankful for all that he has done in years past and this year included, to recognize me on this day where mothers every where are honored and recognized.

I was always so “busy” getting the Mother’s Day gifts in order as well as preparing the Mother’s Day meal … it wasn’t a day off for me AT ALL … instead, it seemed to be a day that I worked even harder, without any recognition at all for ME being a mother, too.  I worked, I did, I bought, I cooked, I made, I recognized, I honored.  Everyone let me do it, too.  My mother, my grandmother, my mother-in-law, my husband, etc.

Finally I had a melt down one year.  I said WHO is going to celebrate ME?

Well, I did NOT have that complaint this year AT ALL …

As to the answer to the question “Who is going to celebrate ME?”  My daughter … my 18 year old daughter that is graduating at the end of the month … took HER graduation money that she has received from people thus far and went shopping for me.  I did not know this at the time, but it was revealed to me this past weekend.  My darling daughter took her money that was given to her and used it to purchase presents to honor and celebrate me.  She could have (and really should have) taken that money to use on something for herself … and yet, she sacrificed so that I would be honored and celebrated on Mother’s Day.

It all started Friday when my girls announced that they would do whatever I wanted the entire weekend since it was Mother’s Day weekend.  YEA!!!!

We took off to Charleston on Friday to Magnolia Plantation and Gardens.  Oh my goodness!  If you have never been … it is a must see if you are ever in South Carolina!

From the historic house, to the beautiful grounds, there is so much history within the old rice fields alongside of this plantation.  We strolled through the gardens, visited the petting zoo, and enjoyed looking at the miniature horses and donkey as well.  Then, we went up to the house and played on a tree that my now 18 year old daughter played on when we visited this site many years ago.   We took pictures with the beautiful white bridge that is in a lot of people’s wedding photographs from the low country.  We were one with nature as we saw alligators in the ponds and swamps, and that was plenty close enough for me!

We had a wonderful day together, and then we went to the mall.  🙂  Doesn’t everyone after they’ve taken a walk back into time?

Saturday my daughter went out for a bit and returned with flowers … a dozen of the most beautiful white roses I’ve ever seen before!  I can imagine these once tiny white buds slowly opening up into these fist sized roses to share all of their beauty with us.  I placed them in a vase and then gave them a home right in the very center of our dinning room table to enjoy as we had our dinner together as a family.

We spent Saturday with me transferring 12k pictures from my computer onto an external hard drive for safe keeping, and then we were off to dinner at a local restaurant with my parents. Tomatoes and rice were calling my name!    If you’re Southern, you’ll understand.  If not, don’t ask.

Sunday morning I awoke to beautiful gifts from my darling daughter.  As I mentioned earlier in this post, she took her graduation money and purchase gifts for me.  She has a heart as big as Texas!    Not wishing for her sister or step dad to feel bad for not having any gifts to give me themselves, my daughter shared the presents that she purchased for me with them so that everyone would have something to give me that morning on Mother’s Day.  That was so incredibly sweet of her, and it truly touched my heart.  Later, she and I had a conversation together where she shared that although it was from her and she had this overwhelming feeling to tell me that morning, she didn’t because she didn’t want to take away from her sister and step dad presenting me with the gifts.  I told her that although she never said a word at that time, she didn’t have to because I KNEW … I knew who celebrated me.  I knew who those gifts were from.  Deep in my heart, I knew that my 18 year old daughter was the one that took it upon herself to recognize, celebrate and honor me on Mother’s Day.  Yes, my day had come … someone recognized me due to their kind and thoughtful heart without me saying a word.  No prodding, no comments, no subtle hints even.  She did this all on her own.  And my heart was overflowing with joy.

After that, I reminded my daughters that they said they would do anything I wanted for Mother’s Day weekend.  Can you guess what I chose to do?  TRAIL RIDING!!!

My 10 year old daughter goes trail riding with us every chance she gets.  She loves it so much and enjoys being with her horse.  My oldest daughter, however, isn’t as thrilled to get on the back of a horse these days.  She will if I beg … but this day, Mother’s Day, all I had to do was smile sweetly as we loaded the horse trailer, packed a lunch, snacks, and drinks, and headed out on the trail.  All four of us got to go together trail riding, which thrilled my heart completely!  That was the greatest gift that money could never buy, the gift of having my family together – all of us – including our fur babies.

After a few hours of trail riding, we returned home where shortly thereafter my parents arrived to have dinner with us.  We grilled out and had an enjoyable evening laughing, talking, and just enjoying each other’s company.

My mom was funny, though, as when she entered my house, she was talking.  I was listening to her with the biggest smile on my face as she had walked right past the dinning room table where a bouquet of flowers sat on the table.  Flowers we purchased for her on Mother’s Day.  We also had a little crystal whatnot (or as she calls them, dust collectors) sitting right beside it that said, “Love You Forever.”   I had to point at the flowers before she looked in that direction, and even then she had no idea that they were for HER … I had to tell her, and then she melted right there on the spot.

Ah, sweet moments like this will be engraved in my memory forever!

All in all, it was a perfect weekend spent with my family.  I celebrated my mom, of course.  But, my daughter celebrated ME!

My husband did take me shopping Friday at the mall, and I picked up some blouses … so that was his Mother’s Day gift to me, which I greatly appreciate.  But, knowing that my daughter used her money that was given to her as a graduation gift to purchase my Mother’s Day … there is a twinge of guilt there, but I know that she sacrificed for me.  My darling daughter thought of me … honored me … and celebrated ME.

That was a great feeling!

Just as I wrote on a Facebook status this weekend … Life is good … God is GREAT … I am blessed and so grateful to God above!

There will never be enough words to adequately express my heartfelt appreciation for what my daughter did for me this past weekend.  She’s really special.  I have known that for quite some time, but this … a completely selfless act, sacrificing for her mother … there are no words to tell you how that feels deep down in my soul.

If you are reading this and might have bombed this Mother’s Day on not recognizing the mother of your children or your own mother, take heart.  There is always next year OR the next “special occasion.”  BUT, why wait?  You can create your very own special occasion … just pick a day that you’d like to do something for them out of the blue.  You know what?  It might mean MORE to them if you do something on a day that it isn’t “expected.”  Whether you buy a gift, make one, take them out to dinner, or just sit and spent quality time with them …  you will light up their entire world with your efforts.

Take time to show the people in your life that they matter.