Team Us
The weather was absolutely beautiful this past weekend so we packed the horse trailer with saddles, bridles, reins, extra hay, and our horses, of course. We set out to find a new heritage preserve in our area where we could ride our horses over 400+ acres. Knowing it would be a bit of a ride, we grabbed Ashleigh Slater’s book entitled Team Us to accompany us on this trip. Little did we know when we set out on this trip that this book wouldn’t just be our “entertainment” as I would read as my husband drove our rig, but it would also open up deep discussions during our travels.
The idea behind this book is to read it together as a couple. You could choose to read it out loud as I was doing while my husband drove, or you could read a section and hand the book to your spouse to read at their leisure. No matter how you decide to do it, it’s just important that the two of you are … dare I say it … on the same page. All silliness aside, though, this book can be used as a valuable tool for a deeper connection and an opportunity for reflection between you and your spouse.
As I went through the first few chapters to catch my husband up on what he had missed since I read ahead, we made a point to go back over the exercises at the end of the chapters. I thoroughly enjoyed the conversation as the miles rolled by. There was serious discussion as well as times we would smile and start laughing as we reminisced together.
The truth of the matter is that a lot of people go into marriage with blinders on. They are so excited about starting their lives together, often times getting wrapped up in all of the details to make their wedding day “just right.” But, what happens after the wedding cake has been cut, toasts have been made, and the final dance has taken place at the reception? You begin your LIFE together as husband and wife. You should no longer be consumed with “me” but should, instead, focus on “US.” You and your spouse took each other’s hand, lit the unity candles at the wedding, and walked down the aisle Mr. & Mrs. united in holy matrimony. And thus you two joined together as a team to do this thing called life! What happens more times than you think is that people are still stuck in their singleness mentality. If that is how you approach marriage, it just will not work. It is, in fact, a team effort. It takes BOTH of you working together to make this union work!
Ashleigh had me from the very beginning as I flipped the pages of this book to the introduction and read a quote from Audrey Hepburn that Ashleigh chose to begin with:
If I get married, I want to be very married.
I said something similar last year when my husband and I went through a rocky period before being more determined than ever to make this work! What’s the point in going through the motions? If you’re going to get married, be ALL into this! Don’t do anything halfway, especially when it comes to marriage! Don’t just give 50% … give 150% ALWAYS! If you’re going to do something, do it with much determination, dedication, devotion, and loyalty! It’s not all about me. It’s not all about him. But it is completely about US!
Being one that does not wish to spoil a good book by giving you all of the details and wealth of information found within the pages, what I would like to do is offer you a book of your own to read! IF you are interested in learning more about Team Us, please enter our giveaway below for your chance to win Ashleigh Slater’s book. I am confident that you will be nodding along as you read her words as you’re sure to identify with them, just as I did. As you read through, you will have a chance to get your spouse involved. You may be surprised, just as we were, of the deep, heartfelt discussions that will follow!
Ashleigh offers ways to strengthen the unity in your marriage. Whether you’re a newlywed or have been married for 12 years like my husband and I have, your marriage will benefit from this book!
Enter to win your copy today!
Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.
Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.
Speaking Their Language
By now you have probably heard about the book entitled The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. Have you read it? If not, you really should! This book will help you speak your loved one’s language.
We all have different things that speak to us and make us feel loved. What works for us may not work for our spouse. We get into trouble a lot of times when we do for them what we think they’d like, when in actuality, we are doing for them things that we, ourselves, would like.
In just a minute, I will give you an example. But first, allow me to point out the five basic love languages as Dr. Chapman talks about in his book. They are as follows:
1. Words of Affirmation – Do you like it when people praise you and say nice things about you?
2. Acts of Service – Do you enjoy when someone does something for you?
3. Receiving Gifts – Does it speak to your heart when someone gives you a gift?
4. Quality Time – The others may be nice, but do you enjoy just spending time together with the one you love?
5. Physical Touch – A hug and a kiss can really be mood enhancers, and we’re not even talking about anything sexual at this point. Do you enjoy sweet caresses on your arm or having him reach for your hand over any of the above?
Pssst … if you are unsure of what your primary love language is, you can take the quiz on Dr. Chapman’s website. Click here to be taken to his site.
If your spouse has the primary love language of physical touch, and yet you buy her gifts instead of holding her hand, putting your arms around her, etc. then you will NOT be filling up her love tank. Gifts are nice, and while I’m sure she’ll appreciate that you thought of her, you won’t score as many points with her as you would if you just caressed her cheek or pulled her close to you.
Where we get into trouble is when we take our primary love language and use it on our spouse. For example, if my husband’s primary love language is words of affirmations, but I choose to display my love for him by doing an act of service instead like washing his car, it just will not deposit that much into his love bank. While I’m sure he’ll appreciate the sparkling car and the “new car” scent of the air freshener I’ve sprayed inside, it just would not have the same affect as it would have if I had stopped for a moment and told him how great of a provider I think he is for our family. I have to realize the impact I would have on him if I spoke directly to his heart through my words of affirmation and praise for him. If I sincerely speak of my admiration and appreciation for all he does for his family and speak of how he provides for us, his love tank would be so full to the point of overflowing!
If all of this seems foreign to you, consider grabbing a copy of Dr. Chapman’s book to read in further detail. OR, visit his website to take the quiz to find out your love language. What would be even better is if you AND your spouse took the quiz and shared your findings with each other. This way, it isn’t a guessing game any longer. You will KNOW what your spouse likes. Then, make it your goal to do everything within your power to fill up their love tanks!
It’s the month of love! What better time to discover your spouse’s love language and start speaking their language?
Note: If you have already discovered your spouse’s love language but would like to better know how to relate to your children, Dr. Chapman also has a book that discusses the Five Love Languages of Children and Teens as well! Check both of them out! You can also read our thoughts as we reviewed the teen book previously on our blog and dug deep into each specific love language.
Click here for Acts of Service & Gifts
Click here for Physical Touch & Quality Time
Click here for Words of Affirmation
It is so important to let your children and teens know that they are loved. Get to reading so you can speak their language, too!
Welcome To The Month of Love!
It’s here! Are you as excited as I am?
It starts today!!
Welcome to the month of love!
Ladies and gentleman, we don’t just want to celebrate the wonderful feeling of love for one day … no, no no! We want to celebrate it ALL … MONTH … LONG!
After all, to love and to be loved is the greatest gift we can give another human being!
Let me tell you of the greatest display of love ever! That was when Jesus died on the cross for all of our sins. What a way to say, “I love you …”
With letters of crimson,
God wrote His love
On a hill side so long, long ago
For you and for me,
Jesus died
And love’s greatest story was told!
I love you …
I love you …
THAT’S what Calvary said
I love you …
I LOVE you …
I love you, written in red.
I had the privilege of singing the words of this song at a revival several years back. This song has been a favorite of mine for some time, and what a feeling to be able to sing those words! I didn’t just sing those words, though, I thought on the message of the song and how great the Father’s love was for ALL of us to send His only son to die on the cross for us. There is no greater love and no greater display of love than Jesus dying for you and I.
That’s how we will begin the very first day of February – our month of love. Think on God’s love and the love Jesus had in His heart when He bore all of this for us.
