Heavy Hearts
We visited with our dear friend, Debbie, this weekend. We have returned home with heavy hearts now more than ever after seeing her in the condition that she is in. It is truly heart breaking.
Debbie was so full of life in September as she showed us around her town. And now, she lays in that hospital bed with her head drooping somewhat to her right side as the cancer has taken away her ability to walk and to control her neck now. Her right arm is paralyzed according to her husband, while she tries with all of her might to use her left arm and hand.
An adjustable hospital bed was delivered to Debbie’s home Friday, and she tried Friday night to get it into a comfortable position. There’s no such thing, according to her, now, though. Nevertheless, she would send that bed all the way up as high as the setting would allow toward the ceiling just to move it back down again. She would press those buttons with all of her might, and she would find temporary relief for her legs. She’d move it to another position within minutes. At other times, she would adjust the head of the bed to provide some support for her neck. We bought a travel pillow to place around her neck to help offer some support. She didn’t like it at first, but she accepted it back after a few minutes. Later, she had it removed again and used rolled up towels to steady her neck. Then she’d go back to adjusting the bed – the only thing she probably feels like she can control at this point.
My heart hurts for this lady. She is only 60 years old. While that may sound old to some, it is so young in my eyes. She is supposed to have so many more years here on this earth, and yet, she is slowly slipping away.
Her husband, Ray, has been caring for her, and his love and devotion shines through. They married just after Debbie turned 18, according to Ray, and they have been married now for 42 years. That is just amazing! But to see him in action, how he dotes on Debbie and would do anything in the world to take her pain away … it grabs you right there in the heart. That is love! Ray took his marriage vows very seriously as he’s doing all he can with the strength that he has to care for his wife. The roles were reversed a few short years ago as Ray was having health issues, and Debbie was right there by his side throughout the entire ordeal. She took care of her man, and now he is taking care of her. It warmed my soul to see him in action this weekend and to see the love in his eyes as he spoke of being married to her. He began to tear up as she told us that she had declined rapidly in the 12 hours before we arrived on Friday.
There truly are no words to describe what is happening to our dear friend, and yet here I sit as I want others to know about this precious lady and to uplift her in their prayers. She needs it now more than ever.
Just a few short months ago, we were laughing and having the absolute best time with our friends. Now we fight back tears as we update each other or receive updates from the family. We did get Debbie to smile this weekend, and her husband said that she hasn’t done that in a very long time. We started cracking jokes about how Debbie tried to keep us all straight, and that was a job in itself! She smiled, and it warmed our hearts. I tried harder then to find something else to crack a joke about to help lift her spirits, and there it was again. That sweet smile that formed across Debbie’s lips. Although she’s weak, she is still very “with it” and keeps up on the conversation. It may take her a bit to respond now as she forms her thoughts and concentrates to get them out, but she is still very much aware even so much as to offer a phone number when her daughter needed to contact her aunt! We were very impressed with that one!
Oh Debbie. Sweet Debbie.
I took the opportunity every chance that I could this weekend to tell her that I love her. I repeated myself, but THAT, my friends, NEEDS to be repeated! I don’t know if I’ll get the chance again to hold her hand, look into her eyes, and say, “I love you, lady!” I hope. I pray. But it is all in God’s hands.
Debbie was surrounded by her daughter and granddaughters, as well as her husband and her aunt, as we went to leave to travel back to our house. That house was packed to the rim with love, pure love!
Please, if you can right where you are, stop reading for a moment and offer up prayers for our dear friend, Debbie. Please also pray for all of the cancer patients that are struggling right now. We don’t have to call them all by name, as it would be impossible as there are people all over the world inflicted with this. God knows their names and their situations as we cover them all with prayer.
Cancer has touched my family in the last seven years – in my mom and in my dad. We pray over them all the time that they will continue to be cancer free after their surgeries. We are so thankful for the treatment that they sought and want to encourage you – all of the readers – please don’t neglect your health. IF you notice anything out of the ordinary, get in to see a doctor as soon as you can. I only wish Debbie had done so sooner.
Prayer warriors … unite!
We know that God could perform a miracle for Debbie right now if that was His will and His plan. In the event that it is not, though, we pray that Debbie will not have to struggle and be in pain. We don’t want to lose Debbie, but we know that she is suffering at this time. They were giving her morphine, and even that was not touching the nerve pain, according to her husband.
She needs us to go before the throne of Jesus offering our prayers, and I thank you from the very bottom of my heart for praying for our precious friend, Debbie.
Update: We were just advised that our dear friend, Debbie, has passed away. Please keep her family in your thoughts and prayers as this most difficult time. Debbie will forever be in our hearts, and I am thankful for 17 years of the most beautiful and precious friendship. I love you, Debbie. Always & Forever!
For previous posts regarding Debbie, please see the below:
Where Two Or Three Are Gathered In His Name
One God, One Plan, One Life
My daughter received this 365 day devotional book by Max Lucado from me in the summer of 2014 entitled One God, One Plan, One Life. She was not too terribly thrilled to be the recipient of this book at the time. She had little desire to read any book over the summer but certainly not one of a religious nature. I explained to her that this wasn’t a book where you read chapter upon chapter in one sitting. It was a daily devotional to help her get her day started off in the right direction. Still, there was little interest.
Until …
She began cleaning her room over this past weekend, and out from under a pile of things came this book! Much to our surprise, she came out of her room with this book in hand and actually began reading the devotional for that day. Of course my eyes lit up and my heart swelled with pride with the sight and sound of my darling daughter taking the time to read what this book had to offer. Finally.
When she was little, we had a children’s daily devotional that I would read with her at night. It had a short story along with bible verses and a prayer at the end. While she has certainly grown up a lot since that time, she is still in her teen years and therefore needs a teen version of a devotional. This book fits just perfectly as it is intended specifically for teens. As we all know, teens deal with a lot of things that adults don’t have to think about now that they’re older. It is still very much an issue for teens, though, from bullying to alcohol and drug usage among their peers to even issues like purity and self control. This book covers it all in a way that sheds God’s light on these hard to talk about subjects.
My daughter left the book laying around last night, and I picked it up to see what it had to offer. It spoke to my heart right there where I was, yes, even as an adult. We all struggle from time to time with our self worth and being able to love and forgive ourselves. Well, right there at the bottom of the page were these words:
You’ve made mistakes. You keep falling short. No one seems to value you. I get all that. But God forgives you, loves you, believes in you, has a wonderful plan for you. Who are you to reject the one opinion that counts? Love him. Love others. Because he commands it.
Wow.
What a perfect message right when we needed it the most. God’s plan … not mine. He knew what I needed to speak to me, and His message was clear.
Whether you read this daily devotional or another, we encourage you to start or end your day with a daily devotional of your choice. You will find inspiration and things that make you think. You will start your day or end your day (depending on when you read your devotional) on a positive note, and you will feel peace within your heart as you meditate on the words allowing them to soak into your being.
Five minutes is pretty much all it takes. Surely you have five minutes to spare to improve your outlook on life and spend a little time with Jesus. If not, then you’re just too busy! Slow down and take time to enjoy this journey that you’re on and the life that God has given to you! We are so blessed … so truly blessed!
Where Two or Three Are Gathered In His Name
This is my dear friend, Debbie. This precious lady is really more like a second mother to me. No matter what was going on in my life, she has always been there. We’ve known each other for the past 17 years and have shared much laughter as well as tears.
If you’ve been following along for a while, you’ll remember a post from September when our little crew rallied around Debbie after learning that she had breast cancer. Our friend, Betty, and her daughter, Haylie, came all the way from Oklahoma to put their arms around Debbie. Our other friend, Sylvia, traveled from Alabama with her son, Andrew, for the very same reason. We just wanted to love on Debbie for a little while. We wanted her to truly know the love we have in our hearts for her.
Back in September, we were able to forget for a little while what brought us together for that weekend. We threw our heads back laughing and enjoying each other’s company and the unique personalities that gathered around Debbie. We had a good time that weekend, my daughters and I. We took our friendship of 17 years with these precious individuals beyond the computer screen and the Lifetime Lounge and took it into real life. Why not? We had shared our lives with each other through the years any way, the good as well as the bad and the ugly! It was time – past time, honestly, to meet in person and give real hugs versus cyber hugs.
Now, the reality of the situation is forced in our faces once more. Debbie is really sick and is struggling due to the affects the cancer has had on her body. It has taken its toll, going from her right breast and in to her lymph nodes. The last report that I received was that the cancer had spread to her liver as well as fluid around her lung and into her spine. It wasn’t in her brain at that time, though. As you can imagine, this was devastating news for all of us. We can’t begin to imagine what her family must be going through and what she, herself, is having to endure.
This is where it gets really tough!
This is where we ask … Why?
Why did it have to be this way? Debbie is a good person! Why must she go through this and suffer so? Why couldn’t it have been caught sooner or prevented altogether? Why is this happening? No one has these answers here on this side of Heaven.
And at a time like this, all we can do is gather together and offer prayers to our Heavenly Father on Debbie’s behalf. We did just that the evening before we all had to part ways in September. We gathered around Debbie in a hotel room after hours spent together that day with our dear friends that traveled from states away, and we placed our hands on Debbie as we all bowed our heads and prayed for her and over her. Debbie cried. Real tears rolled down her cheeks, and after the prayer, she said that she has never felt more loved in all of her life. Mission accomplished. We came that weekend for her to feel our love, and she did, as strong as ever!
None of us could haven known what the future would hold. No one knew but our Father in Heaven. He knows the plans He has for Debbie. He knows why she had to walk this path.
We don’t understand, and yet there are things we aren’t supposed to understand. All we know is that our friend is hurting and needs us …
And so … we are returning to Georgia this weekend.
We have heard from Debbie’s daughter that she is having a really hard time and unable to get out of bed without assistance. They made the decision to call Hospice in. And … we, her friends, made the decision to call the prayer warriors together … now more than ever before … to surround our dear friend, Debbie, to uplift her when she’s feeling so down, for God to give her strength when she is so weak, for Him to provide comfort when she’s hurting:
For where two or three are gathered together in my name,
there am I in the midst of them.
Matthew 18:20
God was there that evening in September when we gathered around Debbie to pray for her. I know that without a shadow of a doubt. I believe Debbie not only felt the love we all have for her, but she received a touch from God Almighty that evening as well. I believe He enabled her to hold on a little longer as she has two grown children, lots of grandchildren, and one great-grand on the way. She’s been so strong for so long, and the last message we received from her personally spoke of how she wanted to give up. Of course, we told her that was NOT an option. Keep fighting the good fight … and she has.
We are rushing to her side tomorrow even if all we can do is sit with Debbie, hold her hand, and pray with her, for her, and over her. God will be there. He has never left her side. In fact, He’s carrying her in His loving arms when she’s unable to get around on her own. God has her in the palm of His great and mighty hand. He’s not letting her go. Debbie will be healed, whether it is on this side of Heaven or when she gets to Heaven. As painful as that was to write, I know that Debbie will not suffer much longer. Whether Jesus reaches down and heals her completely on Earth, or whether that just is not in the plans … she will suffer no more when Jesus calls her home to be with Him. There won’t be any more pain, no more suffering, and there won’t be any need for Debbie to shed any more tears. No, there won’t be any tears in Heaven. Debbie will be made whole once again.
We don’t want to lose her, please know that. Selfishly, we want Debbie here with us. We would take this all away from her in a minute if we possessed the power to do so. Yet, we do not. We do have the power to pray, and that is the weapon that we will arm ourselves with tomorrow as we go to battle with this thing that has taken over her body. We will pray, we will fight when she is unable to do so on her own. We will lift up our voices to God in Heaven on her behalf, and we ask you to do the same. Oh, I know you don’t know Debbie personally, but please … say a prayer for her. Pray with all your might, or just whisper a silent prayer … GOD HEARS THEM ALL!
And …
He’s in our mist.
With heavy hearts, we will travel to Georgia on this Friday morning to see our sweet friend’s face. We will gather around her bed, if need be, and pray.
This trip won’t be like the last one. It won’t be fun and laughter like before. I have prepared my daughters who have insisted that they have to go as well. And so, they shall. I believe that God hears the prayers of little children, and they will be offering up their prayers on Debbie’s behalf as well.
Prayer Warriors UNITE!
