Classic Christmas songs can be heard floating through the kitchen as the tunes seem to dance right out of the speakers.
o/~ o/~o/~ o/~o/~ o/~
“It’s the … most … won … der … ful … time … of the year … “
For some, this rings true. However, have you stopped to consider that for a lot of people, though, this time of year brings a tremendous amount of pain with it? As people are rushing here and there getting in the Christmas spirit, others are mourning the loss of loved ones and are finding it hard to greet the day let alone finding Christmas cheer.
Just this past weekend, a precious soul was lost. No one truly knows what another is going through. While there was speculation, no one can confirm or deny except for the person themselves or God above. Regardless of the reasoning, this lady took her own life. And the community is at a loss as to why this beautiful and vibrant 77 year old would do such a thing. Now, instead of planning for the holiday meal and wrapping presents, the family is making funeral arrangements.
Would you please pause for a moment and offer up a special prayer for people EVERY where that are hurting? It seems to be magnified at this time of year. Hearts are hurting all through the land.
There are those suffering with the loss of loved ones, loss of jobs, or even not sure how they will make ends meet. Others are struggling mentally with things or are physically dealing with an illness. Regardless of the reason, they need our love and prayers. We need to show compassion and speak softly around others because we truly do not know what they are dealing with or when they might be at their wits end. Some may be holding on by a thread, and your kindness toward them can make a world of difference as to what they decide their next step in life will be.
Will you join me in being an encouragement to those hurting in the community at this time of year?
Where ever you are, please pray for all the hearts that are hurting this holiday season.
Bright colors leap off the page now when I flip through the bible. When once I felt I was disgracing the Holy Word by doodling in my bible, it has actually become a trend for the vast majority in this day and age. Bible journaling is gaining in popularity.
I’ll never forget my grandmother’s bible. The worn cover opened to reveal notes she wrote in the margin. While I imagine some were written as she was listening to the preacher behind the wooden podium, others were written as prayers from her heart to God. These prayers were for her family. Ah, she was forever praying for and over her family.
We didn’t fully come to realize the messages she some times scribbled in her bible until it was given to us after her death. It was then that my line of thinking started to shift, and I realized how truly special it was to write in the bible.
Now, as I pick up my colored pencils, I realize that one day my children and perhaps even my grandchildren will hold my bible in their hands reading the words that I have written.
With this in mind, I slip the colored pencils out of the pouch and go to work. I quickly find that purple and red have become my favorites as they, to me, symbolize royalty and the blood of Jesus.
There are all kinds of things you can write and include inside of your bible. Whether you choose stickers, or if you just want to write out bible verses in multi-color like I started to do, your bible will really come to life.
My children enjoy using the gift set, although I have not allowed them to claim it as their very own. Yet … anyway. ~smile~ As Christmas is approaching, this would make a GREAT Christmas present for a family member or good friend! Click here to purchase this Bible Journaling Kit, OR click here to enter a giveaway!
While I received a gift set from Propeller/Fly-By Productions, the opinions expressed here are my own and were not influenced by their gift.
She slid the red hardback book from the box and held it in her little hands. Revealing her delight, she whispered, “Wow.” Sitting Indian style on the hardwood floor, she placed the book in her lap and started to read. Never looking up or pausing, she read the book cover to cover in one sitting. Although she’s heard the story of Jesus’ birth many times through the years, she sat engrossed in this book soaking in every word. I watched as she carefully removed each letter from God at the end of the story. Without a doubt, those letters, full of God’s promises and love, touched her heart completely.
Are you one of the parents that started the tradition with your little ones of giving them a new pair of pajamas and books on Christmas Eve? If so, this book would be perfect to add to their collection. The book I am speaking of is Christmas Love Letters.
For me, I never tire of hearing about the birth of our Lord and Savior. As we are approaching this holiday season, what an appropriate time, now more than ever, to share the story of how Jesus came to this earth as a tiny baby boy. His entire goal, mission, and reason for being here was to save us all. That is the greatest gift you could ever receive right there.
I encourage you to consider purchasing this book for your little ones this holiday season. It is sure to be a favorite of theirs. I’ll admit that I took a sneak peak inside the book myself, and it touched my heart, too.
Imagine your child getting a letter from God. Now, they can! Consider Christmas Love Letters for your little one this holiday season!
While I did receive a sample of this product from Fly-By Productions/Propeller Consulting, LLC in exchange for a review, the opinions expressed here are my own and were not influenced by the gift.
Lounging in my plush recliner on a crisp November day, we heard a horn blowing off in the distance. Realizing that it must be the mail carrier at our security gate, my husband sprang to his feet and headed out the door in his sock feet. Within a few minutes, he returned holding a brown box in his hands. I didn’t fully come to realize until later that this item he held in his grip would be a blessing in a box.
As I reached inside to inspect every item which was placed with care, I started to thumb through the Impact Guide. I soon realized that this box was full of goodies that fulfilled a higher purpose. Sure, they were to make me feel encouraged upon receiving them, but more importantly, the items were an encouragement in other people’s lives around the globe as well.
Take the light gray and white towel, for instance. My heart softened as I held the light cotton fabric in my left hand. With the Impact Guide in my right hand, I read that a group of artisans in Istanbul, Turkey created them on looms. Immediately my mind went back in time to when my daughters received a loom kit for Christmas and sat around their own looms making pot holders. These multi-colored pot holders held such special meaning to me back then because they were made by my children’s own hands. While this memory is dear to my heart, now every time I use this towel, I will silently think of and reflect on the hands of those precious people that made it.
My children have always been fans of bracelets, so they were quick to pick up the brown #Unashamed bracelet. They will wear it with pride now, especially knowing it was made by people in Haiti. What I absolutely love is the fact that Haiti Made creates jobs for those who were once in long-term orphan care, as well as unemployed mothers and others in the community. They are making an impact where it matters most.
Having just said recently that I need to drink more water, this gift box will make it easier as it contained Everly Drink Mix. This is another item I did not have a problem claiming for myself. I try to keep a bottle of water on my desk at the office, and this Pomegranate Maqui Berry flavor will definitely make it more appealing throughout the day. An added bonus is that it does not have any calories, either! What touches my heart is knowing that a portion of the funds from the sale of this item will be used to supply mothers in rural Zambia with oral rehydration salt mixes. This is so important as they use it to treat their sick little ones with waterborne diseases, which saves them from dying from dehydration!
Last, but not least, is the Faithbox Carabiner Keychain! My husband has always been a fan of these types of keychains as they quickly attach to his belt loop for easy retrieval when he needs his keys. They serve other purposes, too, which my daughter likes because she can attach it to her book bag so she’ll always know where her keys are.
As you can see, every one in my family benefited from this gift box full of items.
My personal favorite, though, is the Everyday Faith book. It reminds me of a recent visit to Lake Lure, North Carolina with the mountain scene on the front, but the pages within this little book are full of encouragement! As it speaks of beginning a new adventure, it offers words to encourage you as you take that leap of faith. As you begin to explore new territory, it provides thought provoking passages to help along the way. With bible verses for every day of the month, and uplifting messages underneath, it also offers a time of reflection allowing you to write your own thoughts.
I’ve come to realize that this would make the perfect gift. The holidays are here, so why not consider this for your special loved ones on your list? What I love is that this could be the gift that keeps on giving meaning that you don’t just get one gift in the mail and that’s it. While you can certainly choose a one time delivery of Faithbox, there are options to sign up for three months or even a year. As you’re considering what to give those on your list, please seriously consider this precious gift so others will realize the blessing this box will provide for them as well.
While I did receive a complimentary Faithbox from Family Christian, it did not influence my opinion or this review in any way. I genuinely enjoyed the items, but I realize each Faithbox will contain different items than the ones in my box. I have full faith that they will bless someone’s heart upon receipt.
Election 2016 has come and gone. Leading up to the election, we heard disparaging comments against both candidates. Tempers flared on Social Media as opinions were high right along with people’s blood pressure! Having never been one to discuss politics in an open forum, I continued with my every day type of posts. Although my newsfeed reflected posts flying left and right stating the reasons my friends were for a particular candidate and why they were against the other, I stayed out of it.
People lost sleep staying up until all the results were in. Even after that, sleep would not come to those who had their hearts set on a particular candidate just to end up disappointed when the other won the election. Others, like myself, went to bed knowing that God would take care of us all.
Now it’s the morning after, and all the talk has still been about these two candidates. I’m hearing how unworthy people think one is and how strong the other appeared in the face of rejection and defeat. On the flip side, I’m hearing how one appeared to be a sore loser last night with not addressing those rooting for her. Meanwhile, the stock market took a dive, then rose today giving hope to those who were pulling for our President-elect.
Politics have ruined some friendships along the way also. Just this morning I saw a post from a friend stating she had to unfriend people last night due to how heated things were becoming when they’d post.
In the mist of all of this last night, I was reminded how precious friendships truly are. You see, we lost a very special friend. He breathed his last breath after a struggle with cancer. His wife was truly devastated, her mind any where but on this election. She wept deep from her soul as she said, “I love him and I’m going to miss him so much. I don’t know what I’m going to do without him.” When I asked what I could do for her, she replied through her sobs, “Love your husband, Shirley, and tell him to love you. That’s what I want you to do for me. LOVE EACH OTHER.”
I think after all of this with the election, we can agree that we’d like to see a change. With that in mind, why not start with the person we see every morning in the mirror? Why not take my precious friend’s advice? As she spoke through her deep, heart-wrenching sobs and said, “LOVE EACH OTHER.”
We can start by checking ourselves and our attitudes. We can be kinder than ever before knowing that people are struggling. There are those hurting deeply, and they need us to be compassionate. They need us to come alongside them and place our hand firmly on their shoulder as we say, “I’m here for you.”
Don’t let politics or a difference of opinion put a wedge between you and your family or friends. We need each other in this life. Rally around each other. Be the support system for those in need. Love your neighbor and do unto others as you would have done to you. Life is hard at times, but we don’t have to be hard on each other.
Elections will come and go. Friendships should not – not due to a difference of opinion surrounding presidential candidates.
Love each other. That’s the great “take away” in this message today is just to simply LOVE – despite an election, despite differing opinions, even despite different lifestyles. What we truly need is to love each other. Make amends and pull together. Show that you want a better nation. Let the change begin within.
Ah, yes. Election 2016 has come and gone. Let the change you wish to see in the world begin with the person you see in the mirror each morning.
Everyone’s journey is unique and different. No two people will travel the same path in life or encounter the same things. While there may be similarities, your journey will be set apart from others.
I see you there comparing your life to those around you. Stop! This only ensures that you live anything but happily ever after.
There will always be someone who seems to have more than you. Others will seem to have just what you wish you had in life, too. Then there’s always those who seem to have it so easy while you’re struggling. Making comparisons and turning green with envy will not change your outcome or your journey. You will only become bitter and full of regret.
Learn to love where you are and how far you have come in life. Enjoy this journey that is specific to only you.
I realize we are only human after all. When it looks like someone is getting further ahead than you are, the green eyed monster rears his ugly little head. Don’t stay there, though. Instead, forge ahead and think of all the many blessings you have in your life.
I’ve noticed a lot of people have started with the 30 Days of Thankfulness associated with the month of November. With Thanksgiving just around the corner, people are more focused on their blessings rather than their trials at this time. What if we all shifted our focus the other 11 months of the year? Think of the difference this would make as you journey through life.
As I reflect back on “the chase,” when he “captured me,” and when we settled into life as a family, I also realize I’ve learned a few things along the way.
I’ll get into the story of us in a moment, but allow me to speak of the knowledge I’ve gained in these past 14 years.
There are rather bold people in this world who will look you in the eye and say things purposely to hurt you. They will refuse to attend your wedding claiming they do not support your union, meanwhile they secretly wish to see you continue to struggle in life. These people are not your friends if they rejoice in your suffering and ridicule you when your heart has finally found happiness.
I’ve learned that people will not always be on your side. They will not always support your decisions. Things will come along in life that shake your foundation and threaten to rip your heart open to the very core. Some people will help you gather broken, shattered pieces now scattered all around as your heart faces the biggest house-leveling tornado you never saw coming. Having no way to prepare, all you can do in the aftermath is find the will to keep breathing in and moving on.
There will be those that pretend to your face to be your best friend with only the best intentions at heart, yet they will turn slowly from you to tell your business to any one that will listen speaking things you trusted to only them. They will take your trusting heart and betray you time and time again, knowing your forgiving heart will grant them forgiveness once more in the end. While I may, indeed, our friendship will never be the same again.
And sadly, there will be those attempting to place a wedge between you and your spouse. Old hurts are often revisited and brought back up as a way to taint your marriage, yet you’ve long moved on from that place they still continue to take you back to time and time again.
For all those not in favor of my life choices, there are plenty of others cheering me on, kneeling down in prayer each night and asking God to continue to bless our family and our union.
And with that said, I’ll continue with the brief story of us.
Our story isn’t the traditional one where we met, fell in love immediately, and couldn’t wait to get married, though. This boy worked HARD to win me over! For two years, he chased after me. Having gone through a really bad divorce, I was NOT interested whatsoever in anyone at that point. I was actually anti-man for a while (except for my daddy). But, this fellow kept calling, periodically sending flowers to my work, cards in the mail, etc. I remember telling my parents about it and asking, “WHY won’t he stop?” My dad said, “He’s persistent, you have to give him that. Besides, he knows a good thing when he sees it.” My mom, smiling so innocently, looked over at me and said, “You’re going to marry him one day.” Me? Marry HIM? Never!!! HA!
It wasn’t until he asked me to listen to Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls that everything changed. Quite disturbed at his request at first, I did finally give in and listened to the words of the song. There is a part in there that says, “I just want you to know who I am …” and then I realized I truly hadn’t given him a chance at all. Well, that moment in time changed all of that. Right then and there, my heart started to shift more favorably in his direction.
We dated for two years before we got married, so all total it’s been 18 years of craziness. We’ve had our good times, as well as our bad, like EVERY couple does (and if you say you haven’t gone through anything in your married life, you’re lying because everyone does whether they want to admit it or not). Through it all, we’ve held on to each other, and we have been so very proud of the two daughters we have raised. God has richly blessed us, and we are so grateful.
He stepped into the role of being Nicole’s father without hesitation when her real father stepped out. We started our lives together as a family, even including her in our wedding ceremony, presenting her with a necklace at a certain point in the wedding. It was truly a precious moment that will forever be etched into my mind when he got down on one knee and placed a sparkling ballerine necklace around her little neck. And before he stood back up, she reached her little angel arms around his neck, as she stood on her tippy toes, and hugged him tightly. We were united and presented to our guests not as husband and wife but as a family. ♥ And, what do you know? My mama was right after all!
A few years later, we were blessed with another daughter, who is also the light of our lives. When I tell you that she is my miracle baby, believe it, because she truly is. Only God knows what all I went through to have her, but it was worth it and so much more. She has blessed my heart and my life, and I sit in tears as I think of my two beautiful baby girls who are my life, my heart, and my soul. Oh thank you, God.
Our union has been blessed, and through all the struggles and trials that we’ve faced, we’re still together. We’re still going strong, and he’s still the one I love.
It doesn’t seem like a grand total of 18 years together, but I sure hope God blesses us with many, many more years of living, loving, and laughing together. I want to hold his hand when I’m 85 years old and say, “We made it, baby.”
As you have read, the majority of my post today has spoken of the good in my husband of 14 years. I have chosen to look past the flaws and things he may have done to hurt me or let me down during our total of 18 years together. I have, instead, focused on the things that bring a smile to my face and continue to warm my heart to this very day. It’s a decision, really. For you see, I am not perfect either. I have flaws and imperfections, too. There are times I’ve hurt my beloved. Yet, it is my hope that he continues to look past those times and celebrate the love we have in our hearts and that which is reflected back to us in the faces of our two beautiful daughters. When the times got tough, as they do in every marriage, we chose to keep our family together because of those bright blue eyes of both of our daughters. While some would have given up when the waters of marriage became rough, we knew our girls were watching to see how we’d handle difficult situations we were forced to face. We chose to weather the storms of life and stay together. I can say with all honesty and sincerity, God is the glue that held our family together.
“Daddy, have you been keeping up with the storm?” I asked.
“No, not really. Why? Should I?” He replied with little concern in his voice.
“Yes! Hurricane Matthew is going to impact South Carolina. They’re saying it’s going to be like Hurricane Hugo was for us back in 1989.” I said, trying not to be an alarmist, but hoping he’d see the seriousness of this approaching storm!
“I haven’t really been watching it. I just have a peace about it, and I don’t think it will be that bad.” He said, in the calmest tone ever.
This was a conversation I had with my daddy two days prior to Hurricane Matthew pounding South Carolina’s coast. While we’re not right on the coast, I knew from the news reports that we would be affected in our area.
Taking a moment to reflect back on Hurricane Hugo, I remember feeling nervous and anxious in 1989 with the threat of a hurricane approaching. We boarded windows on our blue house and rode it out that night. At the time, we lived in a block house, so we did not fear damage to our structure so much. With windows boarded, we prayed no trees would fall on the roof as we tried to steal a few hours of sleep. We awoke to downed trees, but we were spared a huge amount of damage, unlike others in our area. I remember doing yard clean up work when one of my former classmates drove up in our yard. My face flushed with embarrassment as they giggled at me, but without lights or water, there was no way to shower. I tried the best I could to look presentable, but there was no denying my less than perfect appearance with hair tossed around and no makeup.
Fast forward 27 years that really sailed by way too fast for my liking, and the same nervousness and anxiousness resurfaced as Hurricane Matthew changed course. I knew then, without a shadow of a doubt, we would feel the affects of this hurricane further inland.
Bracing ourselves for the worst, we filled all of our vehicles with gas just in case we needed to join the mass of others evacuating. We consulted with some of our horse friends in the area, but they thought our horses would be fine in our pasture instead of finding a facility elsewhere to house them until the threat of the storm was over. As the rain started, we were under the shelter tagging our horses with ribbons braided in their manes bearing our names and phone numbers just in case our fence got damaged in the storm and our horses got out. Tears filled my eyes at the thought, but I forced them back so as not to upset my children who were helping us.
Arming ourselves with food, water, flashlights, and ensuring the RV was positioned out of harm’s way, we prayed as Hurricane Matthew drew nearer. Sleep was scarce as the wind and rain slowly began tapping on our windows at first, then became more forceful as it beat angrily on the side of the house and roof so strongly at certain points we felt it would surely burst right through our wooden structure. Thoughts of the big bad wolf from my childhood days ran through my mind as the wind threatened to huff, and puff, and blow my little white house in the country down completely. I forced those thoughts right out of my head and began praying to God instead! As I tiptoed down the hall in the wee morning hours and began to peer out of the living room window, I prayed over the two trees way too close to the front of my house for my liking at that point in time. When once I admired those tall, strong trees, they now became a threat to me as if one fell with the force of the wind, I feared it would land directly on my living room and garage. More upsetting was the thought of the other falling across my children’s rooms. They swirled and swayed back and forth, and at other times looked like someone was shaking them viciously as they were tossed to and fro by the relentless wind. I had a long conversation with God concerning those rather large trees and pleaded with Him for protection over our family. Suddenly, our lights began to flicker, then went completely out leaving us in utter darkness alone with the big bad wolf still beating on our door with this feeling of impending doom deep inside of us.
When daylight began to break through leaving the night sky and my fears behind, I ventured outside to check on the horses. Tears stung my eyes as I found them huddled together under their shelter. The one pony they always seem to leave out in the rain was tucked under the shelter, too. It was as if the other horses had compassion and said, “Okay, little one, you can join us. We do love you, even if we don’t always show it.”
As the rain and wind subsided, we gathered our belongings and headed to the RV. We realized during the previous ice storms we’ve had that our area will be one of the very last with power restored, unfortunately. Having just purchased this Class A Fleetwood Flair RV in March, I whispered prayers of thanks to God for us making the right decision with this purchase! I’ll never forget how we went back and forth until we finally decided it would be a wise move, and this past weekend certainly proved that to be true. We were able to fire up the generator and live in comfort for short periods of time, in an effort to conserve gas. With the water tank completely full and LP gas on board, we were able to have hot showers, too!
Being without power forced us to put down our cell phones more since battery life was so precious, it seemed. Since we were not able to watch television, we were outside together watching our horses graze while my youngest daughter rode her bike. While it seems like a hardship, it makes you spend time with your family that you really should be spending with them any way! I think even after the storm and this timely reminder, we should make more of an effort to put down our phones and turn off our televisions to really get to know our family members again!
When we ventured out in our neighborhood, it didn’t take long for us to realize why we were still without power.
As we drove cautiously around the curve, it almost seemed like more trees were down than standing! Sadly, as we approached a group of homes, we noticed a tall pine tree uprooted and laying over on a house.
Transformers were snatched from the ground and power lines from their poles.
And there stood my sweet friend in her yard. We stopped immediately when we recognized her and asked if everyone was okay. She replied that they were, all things considered. She had tarps inside to protect her belongings, but that was all they could do at that point. We were just thankful to hear that no one got hurt and no lives were lost when the tree fell on their house.
After leaving my friend’s house, I thought of another dear friend I hadn’t heard from. With urgency in my voice, I asked my husband to drive to our friend’s house. Night was falling again by the time we found the driveway. We pulled in and searched for their vehicles, but none could be found. We were hopeful that they evacuated and were in a safer area. As we drove home, I whispered a silent prayer for their safety! And … thankfully, the very next day, they sent us a message that all was well. They were without power, and their phones were not charged to reach out to anyone until that point in time. They assured us that we were the first ones they notified of their safety. Oh, thank God for answered prayer! Our friends were safe!
As far as my parents, they never left their house the entire time … and, miraculously, they never lost power! While my dad didn’t get a bit of sleep Friday night into Saturday morning, my mother slept right through the entire thing.
There’s just something about having peace in the mist of the storm. And, there’s something, also, to be said for heeding the warnings and preparing in advance “just in case.”
We’re thankful for another day, and we pray our electricity will be restored soon. As we wait, we realize how fortunate we are in only having a few downed trees in the back of our property. How fortunate we have been! Thank you, God. Sadly, others in our area, especially along the coast, weren’t so lucky.
There is a lesson to be learned by Hurricane Matthew. All week long at work, we had The Weather Channel going as we watched as they tracked this storm. As it approached landfall, it shifted and came further inland than first anticipated. Governor Nikki Haley was begging and pleading with fellow South Carolinians to evacuate and flee their homes. People rushed to the grocery stores to stock up on supplies as Hurricane Matthew drew nearer.
What if we all saw the urgency in getting our hearts and lives right with God before He comes back? What if we watched, prayed, and prepared for the second coming of the Lord like all who had their eyes glued to the news watching the weather? What if we got down on our knees and begged God for forgiveness and hid scriptures away in our hearts? Then we could be like my father with peace in our hearts not fearing what was to come.
Technology is a wonderful thing, and Saturday night, we watched history in the making thanks to how far we’ve advanced with technology in this day and age.
If you’ve been a fan of this page for long, you know of our love for the Morris Island Lighthouse. Engineers got together with the help of SCE&G to delight all of the lovers of this lighthouse. By pressing a button on their cell phone, this lighthouse lit up once again after being out of commission for many, many years. Solar panels were placed on the lighthouse along with batteries to make this moment in history one we shall never forget as long as we live.
It has long been a dream of mine to walk the wrought iron steps of this magnificent lighthouse. While that dream may not become a reality any time in the near future, I still hold on to it like so many others in attendance that night.
A rather large crowd gathered along the sandy shores to share in this moment in time. A ceremony was held with various speakers from the Save The Light organization, to the mayor, as well as a grandmother who donated $250,000 in memory of her granddaughter who passed away in 2014 as a result of an automobile accident. With music playing, the crowd took pictures, enjoyed a slice of cake celebrating the 140th birthday of the Morris Island Lighthouse, and waited anxiously for this beacon of light to come to life at exactly 7:30 p.m. Saturday night. Sitting on the large rocks lining the beach with the waves crashing below our feet, we stared out across the ocean as a tiny light appeared at first and slowly turned toward us to reveal a beam of light that cut through the darkness. As this beacon of light illuminated the night sky, we watched in amazement and wonder completely thrilled to be a part of this moment in history!
Sadly, the lighthouse only remained lit by solar power for four hours Saturday night. That is the maximum allotted time the coast guard could give to this organization. When we realized earlier in the week that it would not remain lit, we knew we had to do everything within our power to ensure we were among the crowd gathered for this event. My heart danced as I watched the light from this tall tower of hope.
Among those in attendance were a couple who got married at the top of the lighthouse in the 1980s. They drove from Wilmington, North Carolina to be there for the lighting. As I listened to the speaker talk of how they walked the steps and got married at the very top, I couldn’t help but wonder what the pictures must’ve looked like from back then. Oh how I wish I could have seen a glimpse into the lighthouse when the steps were in much better shape to allow climbing to the very top. I can only image the breathtaking view of the island from up there!
My mind quickly shifted to the lady before me in the wheelchair. With her white hair blowing with the slight breeze coming off of the ocean, the gentleman attempted to push her through the white sand that seemed to match her hair. I was extremely impressed when the gentleman finally spoke and said she was 95 years old. It was her heart’s desire to be present for this event, and she was well pleased as evident by the smile stretched across her thin, pale lips.
How meaningful this night was for so many of us, and it is one I’ll never forget. It provided hope for all that one day this lighthouse will be preserved and restored completely.
Today I did something I’ve never done before. I ordered hats, scarves, and girly things online. This wasn’t just an ordinary order, though. It was an order of love.
My mother-in-law has gone for her port to be put in today. With that comes the acknowledgement and acceptance that she will ultimately lose her hair.
Easing onto the couch Sunday afternoon, she failed to find a comfortable position. We propped her up with pillows in an effort to help. Raising the foot rest on that end of the couch seemed to relieve some of the pressure. She sat in a reclining position trying to force a smile as she looked at us trying to hold a conversation about anything but what she was facing. Finally, she turned to me and said, “I do not want to lose my hair.” She paused for a moment before she continued, “I am too proud to walk around like that. I want a wig, something to cover my head, maybe even a scarf.”
And her wish was my command.
I know once treatment begins, she will gradually lose her hair within two weeks. Wanting her to have something prior to losing her hair, I found a site today called TLC, which specializes in products for women that are facing hair loss due to chemotherapy treatment.
I spent a good bit of time on the website as I looked through every type of wig and hair accessory you can imagine. Having taken a picture of my mother-in-law Sunday, I held it up to the computer to match her hair style and color as closely as possible. While I know it will be an adjustment, at least she can rest in the knowledge that she will have her items in two to three business days, as I “rushed” the order. She will have these items in time to play with them and see what better suits her before she loses her hair. And I’ll admit, once pressing “Submit Order,” tears stung my eyes as the reality of the situation was before me, and this made it more “real” some how.
Knowing women like a variety, I purchased a wig, hat, scarf, turban, and even what they call an “add-a-bang.” This item is to be worn with hats, scarves, and turbans where it will look like you have some peek-a-boo bangs in the front. They will come full enough where she can choose to show the entire bang, or she can have them thinned to her liking. I tried to match the color as close as possible, and I will keep my fingers crossed that she’ll like and actually use these items when I give them to her.
At a time like this, we focus so much on how helpless we feel. My husband struggles with this. He is a Mr. Fix-It, but there is no way that he can possibly fix this. Unfortunately, this is the hand of cards she was dealt, and she has no choice but to take those cards and play the game with WINNING ultimately the goal. Beat this thing! Kick cancer’s back-side! That is what we all hope to see in her future.
There’s so much you can’t do … for example, you can’t wave a magic wand and make this go away. You can’t wish it or will it away. No matter how angry you get, you cannot change the fact that she has this rare form of cancer in her intestines and abdominal area. As much as we say we hate this, it does not make it go away. It’s here, and all we can do is help her and love her through this.
I told my husband this weekend to stop focusing on what he CAN’T do. Shift your focus to what you CAN do!
“You do not possess the power to heal your mother,” I told him. If we possessed that kind of power, no one would ever suffer or go through anything ever again. We’d simply reach out and touch our mothers, fathers, and other family members to heal them from the tops of their heads to the soles of their feet. Ah, but that is not our place, and we do not possess those powers. Father God does, though, and so we pray with all our might for our family and friends. We know God hears our prayers, and we hope it will be His will to heal them on this earth.
Since we are not guaranteed a miracle or a healing touch from God, what we CAN do is support her, love her, and be there for her. We can take her food we fix in hopes that she will have an appetite and feel like eating it. We can go around looking for comfort items she may need, and we can place orders like the one I placed earlier today.
Walking around moping about it will NOT change what she is going through. She’s facing one of the biggest battles of her life. But, she is not alone. She has all of us and GOD on her side.
My husband started taking a little trip down Guilt Lane, which also does no good at all. Shortly after her diagnosis, he started thinking of all the missed birthdays and occasions when he should have remembered to call or visit but didn’t. Beating oneself up will NOT change what she is facing, though. I told him to go easy on himself. He can’t go back and change the past, but what he can do from this day forward is spend quality time with his mom when he is able and when she feels up to it.
Human beings are so quick to jump on the Pity Train and go right on down Guilt Lane. We beat ourselves up so badly with all the “shoulda, coulda, wouldas” we come up with. It is all non productive!
Focus on what you CAN do at this stage of the game. Take back your power and stand tall. She needs us to be strong when she is feeling weak.
And so we move ahead, unsure of what the future holds … but having complete faith in the One who holds the future.
I’m what’s known now as “The Un-Churched.” You know the kind. They grew up in the church or went to church every time the doors were open once-upon-a-time. Now, however, they no longer darken the door of the church – any church.
People love to get into the bashing game with people like myself. The ones that are still currently going to church on a regular basis look down upon people like me that choose not to go to church. Hmmm, that’s a bit … judgmental … for church-goers, isn’t it?
Don’t mind me. I’m just calling it like I see it.
You see, I was once very active in the church. My dad was the clerk of the church when I was just a little thing growing up. We were at church every time the doors were open, and I grew up being an active part of the church.
When I became an adult, I could choose whether to attend church or not. No longer feeling “forced” by my parents, I still chose to go to church. I changed from the church I attended as a child, and my parents also stopped going to church. What in the world would cause such a thing for dedicated church-going individuals to just suddenly … stop … going to church?
Hurt. That’s what.
Now, I know you’re probably just waiting for the opportunity to launch a quote at me. Aren’t you? The one that specifically talks about how if being hurt by the church causes you to stop going, then your faith was in people and not in God. Ah, but I beg to differ.
Being hurt by people in the church was exactly why my family and I stopped going. I no longer wished to attend church with “holier-than-thou” so called Christians that inflicted such hurt upon my family and I. From preacher’s wives intentionally ignoring me, yet speaking to everyone else in my family … to offering to serve in the choir when attendance was down just to have their nose turned up at me … to various other things that happened. There were others that talked about my family and I even when we were holding a fundraiser for a little girl in my daughter’s 6th grade class many years ago that was diagnosed with cancer. As our hands were busy working to help this little girl and her family, other people in the church were busy wagging their tongues about us.
I’m sorry, but this is NOT the type of church I wish to attend.
What ever happened to including people? Even those that are different from you?
What happened to making people feel welcome and LOVING them just as Christ would have?
And what is this “What would Jesus do?” crap? It’s more than just wearing the bracelet, people! You have to actually stop and ask yourself, “Would Jesus have snubbed this person as you just did?” As a matter of fact, I can assure you, HE WOULD NOT!
I know the bible talks about surrounding yourself with fellow believers and coming together to worship. That’s wonderful, but I choose not to attend church with people like the ones I’ve mentioned above.
More hurt comes from the church!
I’m not saying that ALL church-goers are bad. Certainly, they are not. But there are a few “bad apples” in every bunch that spoil it for everyone else. Those “bad apples” are often times in positions like the preacher’s wife I spoke about or someone in “charge” of the children’s ministry or even someone on the “welcoming committee” being anything but welcoming!
Why don’t we shift our focus off of PEOPLE and back on GOD where it belongs!
I’m talking about taking our relationship with God more serious than just who steps foot into the church building each Sunday morning. As a matter of fact, I get more out of online ministries or watching the sermons on church than I do sitting elbow to elbow with someone I know acts a certain way Monday through Saturday and yet is completely different come Sunday morning.
I’d rather worship God on the back of my horse out in the beautiful countryside. I want a REAL relationship with Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. Yes, even if I never grace the steps of the church again.
And you know what? My church attendance or lack thereof will NOT keep me out of heaven. Nope. It won’t! Regardless of what ones may say, as long as my heart is right with God, I will be welcomed into Heaven when the Lord calls me home. Why? Because I’ve asked Him to come into my heart, forgive me of my sins, and I have chosen to walk with Him.
News flash!
Your church attendance will NOT guarantee you a place in Heaven. Your mansion in Heaven will NOT be given to you due to sitting in that church pew. Someone with the hardest of hearts could come sit right in your very place, and they won’t make it into Heaven any more than you will UNLESS your heart is right with God.
No one … absolutely NO ONE … on the face of this earth knows where you truly stand with God. And they shouldn’t. That’s between YOU and The Master!
So with what being said, who are you, or anyone else for that matter, to sit in judgment of “the un-churched?” It simply is NOT your place. You don’t know the person’s heart. You don’t know what may be going on in their lives.
An example is this – my in-laws are going through a really hard time right now. My mother-in-law has been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer and is unable to attend church. She’s in a lot of pain that prevents her to even sit or lay comfortably. And you know what? NO ONE in her “church family” has come to see her or offered to bring food of any kind. We’re from the South where that’s what we do. When someone dies, we bring food. If someone is hurt in an accident, we bring food. If someone has a cold or pneumonia, we bring food. The South is all about their comfort food, and what better time to offer your support to the family than when you KNOW someone in the family is dealing with something BIG. Yet, no one from my mother-in-law’s church has brought food. My mother-in-law is on the prayer list at her church – a church she has gone to for MANY, MANY years! And yet, just today when I visited her, she mentioned her disappointment … and yes, hurt … over her “church family” not lifting one finger when she’s in the shape she is in.
Ah, that is exactly the hurt I’m talking about that will cause people to shy away from the church. Do you see what I mean?
As my mother-in-law tries to adjust her position to get comfortable any way she possibly can, she remembers ALL the meetings she attended, the family times she cut short just to “serve” at the church … and for what? When they need support, love, and encouragement from their church family … they are in a dry desert with the dust and tumble weeds rolling down the parched earth.
So, think again before you judge “the un-churched.” But, do more. Take this message and be determined NOT to have things turn out like this in YOUR church. Be the one that reaches out even if you’re the only one that does. Be the example of Jesus that everyone needs to see reaching out, loving, caring for, and helping those in need.
A little less judgment and more love is what this world needs – for the churched (as my in-laws have been for years) and yes, even the un-churched.
As we get older, people sometimes grumble when their birthday rolls around. Not me, though! I realize that birthdays are special. Each and every birthday! From the days of youth celebrating with birthday parties, cake, ice cream … to the later years when gray starts creeping into your hair. Each and every birthday is special.
Think on that for a minute.
There are some that are not blessed to make it to your current age – or mine, for that matter.
Some lives are taken too soon, and we are left with a million questions as to, “Why …”
So when your birthday rolls around, take time to CELEBRATE! No matter what age you will be turning, realize that it is a gift from God above.
Yesterday, we celebrated my daughter’s 12th birthday. My, oh my, where has the time gone? It seems like just yesterday I was cradling my six pound three ounce baby girl in my arms. And bam! Over night, she’s grown into this beautiful little girl with the longest legs on her slender frame. Bouncing around with a huge smile on her face, blond curls bouncing up and down right along with her.
I watched as my miracle baby has gone through many stages in her life. She’s into riding horses, playing in the mud doing “tom boy” things while also enjoying twirling around in the dressing room trying on frilly dresses. She is a well rounded individual, for sure! Just this week I had the pleasure of taking her shopping for new clothes. I watched as she looked at herself in the mirror, smiled, turned from side to side, and then twirled around so her dress would flair outward. She’d giggle and do it all over again. We came home with TWO dresses, among other clothes in our shopping bags. I had to chuckle as she exclaimed with a wide smile, “This does NOT mean I’m a girly girl. I’m still a tom boy!”
Last night, we made cotton candy while she videoed the entire thing. It thrilled my heart to see her excitement using her new cotton candy maker. She and her sister made blue, purple, and even pink cotton candy. Oh, what a sugar high!
That was great fun!
I went to bed last night with a smile on my face. My daughter had a great birthday, and that made me feel so good.
This morning when I awoke, I smiled and thanked God for the gift of another day. Today I turned 45 years old. It is so hard to believe because I do NOT feel “this” old at all. I still feel like a teenager, although the two gray hairs that popped up in the crown of my head are trying to say otherwise! Even still, I feel blessed by the gray hair because it means I’ve lived and loved well. What’s more is that God has given me this gift of another birthday to celebrate with my family. I get to enjoy being surrounded by my family wishing me well and sharing their love with me. I appreciate this gift more than words could ever say. I’m here on this earth still living and loving. I have the privilege of a road trip in our RV this weekend with my family. With plans in place, we will set out with great excitement as we anticipate arriving at our destination to relax and unwind on this, our birthday weekend.
With all sincerity, I thank God that I have reached 45 years of age. I ask God to bless me with many more birthdays. I’ve prayed to God for a while now asking Him to please allow me to be a very old woman rocking my great-great grandchildren on my front porch.
God willing … I shall do just that!
Enjoy your day – no matter how old you are! Realize it is a true blessing!
