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Happiness Is An Inside Job
As I sat at my desk Tuesday morning chatting with a friend, we talked of the warmer weather coming this weekend in which I’ll be able to enjoy being back in the saddle again after several days of wet weather in our area.
“And then you’ll be happy,” they said.
To which I replied, “I’m pretty much happy in general these days … by choice … it’s what’s inside and trying hard not to let outside forces influence.”
Wow. That conversation took a serious turn, didn’t it? When we were just having a light conversation about the weather, I took it deeper … a whole lot deeper … with what I said in return.
I sat there for a few minutes after the conversation was over and just thought on that for a second. Then, I took to Twitter where I tweeted, “Happiness is an inside job; a choice not to let outside influences steal the joy down in your heart.”
Have you ever really thought about it?
It is soooo easy to let outside influences steal our joy, isn’t it? I know at one point I was a negative person, and I have tried so hard to change that. Stress was coming at me from all angles it seemed, and I caved under the pressure. I became negative, filled with anxiety, and someone, I’m sure, that wasn’t a pleasure to be around.
Don’t get me wrong. There are times when you have to put your foot down, and that should not be lumped into the same category as being a negative person when you use your authority as a mother to say to your children that they need to pick up their messes that they continuously make in the house. If they were toddlers, then of course I’d expect you to just suck it up Mom and clean up after them. That’s your job. That’s what you do. BUT, when your children are 18 and 10, they are perfectly capable of picking up their clothes instead of leaving them on the bathroom floor, slung down the hallway or on the floor in their bedroom. Telling them to clean up their mess is not being negative in nature.
Now that I got that off of my chest, I’ll move back to my original point in this post.
When once I did let the outside stresses steal my joy, I have worked really hard to not allow that to happen at this stage of the game. If it does have the potential of ruining my mood, I may only stew in it for a few minutes now whereas in the past I would let it haunt me and torment me.
Put both of your hands together with the sides touching pinky to pinky. You hold your hands there close to your body for a few minutes as if they are filling up with every single thing that is causing you stress. Now take those cupped hands and extend it out in front of you. Lift it up high, and imagine that God is taking ALL of your stresses, worries, and anxieties away right in that instant … because He can, and He will … if you ask Him and if you cast ALL of them onto Him. Don’t give them to Him for a second or two and then snatch them back out of His strong and mighty hands. Let God take all of them, every single one. All you need to do at this point is rest in the assurance that God’s got this … and He’s got YOU, sweet child.
Take a deep breath in, and blow it out.
You can carry on in your day with happiness in your heart once more.
If someone cuts you off in traffic, you may not like it but it isn’t worth losing your joy over. Yes, you are allowed to verbalize it, but soon after, let it go.
If someone said something really harsh and ugly to you or about you, let it roll off of you like water on a duck’s back. Don’t marinate in the wrongdoings of others! It isn’t worth sacrificing your sanity and your happiness. Instead, give it to God and try praying for that individual that said those things to you.
Happiness is an inside job. Plain and simple. You can choose to walk around with a chip on your shoulder, but you can also choose to lift your head up to the heavens and praise God Almighty for LIFE! Which would you rather do? Complain, moan and groan, or praise God and thank Him for the many blessings in your life? If you focus on the latter of the two, your entire outlook will improve, and you will be able to reflect the happiness in your heart on your face for everyone around you to see.
Choose to be happy no matter what comes your way.
Man Code 101
Welcome to Man Code 101!
I feel compelled to reveal some of the man code behind how to get your husband, boyfriend, significant other, etc. to open up (besides the woman putting them in a headlock and not releasing until they do! Just kidding!).
Society has really done a disservice to men. They are told to stuff their feelings inside at a young age and not to cry. Later in life this can hinder their relationships when their wives expect them to express their feelings – and for good reason. By the time they get older and are supposed to be mature men, some guys just don’t have any skills developed to handle these types of emotions because of earlier influences to “suck it up.”
If you say, “Can we talk about our feelings, dear?” don’t be surprised if they first look at you with a blank stare – the deer in the headlights look. Their eyes may get as big as saucers, too. They may even run like a cheetah into their emotional man cave.
Warning! Warning! Don’t go into the emotional man cave with a stick! It’s worse than a mama bear’s cave with her cub. If he retreats, just let him be. It probably won’t last very long.
Also, if you didn’t know it by now, men do have times of the month when they are moody as well. It isn’t just women that go through PMS. Men do as well. Yes, I am a man admitting this!
What can you do to get your man to open up?
*Realize that men struggle with insecurity and self esteem as well. It is not just something that women struggle with. Men are affected, too, and therefore need their wives to offer words of praise to stroke their ego. This isn’t as bad as it sounds. From a man, I do need this as it makes up for the insecurities that I am feeling inside when I am battling low self esteem, too. It helps when Shirley offers words of praise even over the smallest of things. It is huge to me.
*All men love to be encouraged in things they like to do. Just come up with something sincere to let him know that you support him. You will see him kind of turn and light up. THAT is when it’s working! For my wife and I, Shirley supported me in my interest to restore my 1969 Camaro. She encouraged me to get back into a hobby that I used to love, and now she goes with me to car shows. OR, she will drive the 69 around. Can you imagine my smile from the passenger seat? (This car is special to us both as I had it back in high school and made my first trip to see Shirley in that very car!)
*This is similar for women, but in order for a man to have any chance of opening up or peeking his head out of his emotional man cave, he has to feel safe with sharing his feelings without being blamed or feeling threatened. Even if everything is his fault, it is just better to have him see or discover that it is without you pointing it out. I know it sounds like handling a grown man with kid gloves, but men are just like that. There. It’s out now. A man has to trust the woman to handle his emotional side with care and not fault finding and the blame game.
*If he opens his mouth the least little bit, let him finish. Obviously this is a two way street. It shows each other that you truly care what the other has to say and you care about their feelings on both sides.
*Be careful with how you ask questions. Be specific but not harsh, especially if he’s pondering or thinking on something at the moment.
*Laugh at his jokes, yes – even if they are dry. Or get him to laugh at your jokes to lighten things up a little.
*This is similar to what I spoke of earlier on encouraging your spouse in something they enjoy. It is so important to share a hobby together. Men just like doing things together with you, and it is especially important when you share an interest together. That makes it a hundred times better! He is much more likely to talk while working on or doing something you both like and enjoy. For Shirley and I, we enjoy horseback riding together. Just recently, something was bothering me in the middle of a trail ride. We stopped and sat on our horses and just talked it out with Shirley encouraging me about what was troubling me. Pretty soon, I felt better, and we could continue to enjoy our ride. (She even said, “Don’t let this ruin your ride.” If you recall from previous posts, I said something similar in a post I wrote not too long ago. Her reflecting my words back let me know that she was paying attention. I felt validated.)
*Be careful NOT to say things such as, “You never … ” or “You always …” Yes, this is hard on both sides. I acknowledge that.
*Be happy with any progress in him expressing his feelings. Don’t expect too much at once. Once men have suppressed their feelings for so long and finally get to open up, they may feel an emotional overload.
*Find out his love language. This goes back to the very first one that started us off on this list. Words of Affirmation are high on my list, and Shirley knows it.
Don’t be discouraged if your man hasn’t opened up just yet. Give him time, practice the above, and in time, he will begin to open up to you.
Good luck, and best wishes!
Family Movie Night With The Identical
Imagine that it’s the 1930s, in the middle of the depression. Jobs are scarce, and your wife is about to deliver your baby any day now. You are told by your boss that you are no longer needed at work, despite your begging and pleading as you have a wife and child to provide for. Feeling at your wits end and not knowing what to do, you look for any way to make this situation better. Then, your wife gives birth to not one but two baby boys! Oh these sweet miracles should have been the greatest blessing to their parents, yet, anxiety continues to rise within you as you have no idea how you will provide for two babies now. Seeking answers through your faith, you attend a sermon one evening where the preacher tells of the trials he and his wife have experienced in miscarrying a child and fearing they will not be allowed to be parents as their heart desires. Hearing the preacher say it is better to give than to receive, you make your way home to where you present to your wife a proposal to give the preacher and his wife one of your children to raise. At first your wife is not happy with you at all and says there is no way she can possibly give up one of her babies. She grows angry, then tears fill her eyes and find their way down her cheek. Later, however, when things do not get better and with the threat that her children could be taken away, she makes the heart wrenching decision to allow the preacher and his wife to have one of their precious identical twin boys.
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My family and I were seeking a movie to watch so we all sat down for our weekly family movie night with The Identical, and the above is how the movie began. We enjoyed this movie for many reasons from beginning to end and are confident that you will, too! First and foremost, it is, indeed, a family friendly movie. We didn’t have to worry about what our children might accidentally see or hear when this movie started playing. It was clean and suitable for all ages to enjoy, and that we did!
My husband and children especially liked this movie because there were some similarities that made us think of the life of Elvis Presley. (They are huge Elvis fans!) One thing that stood out for us was that his parents were poor, and his mom delivered twin boys; however, the difference is that Elvis Presley’s brother was stillborn. In the movie, the parents made the hard decision to give one of their identical twins away – before they were taken away by the authorities – to a preacher and his wife, and the movie focuses on the preacher’s kid growing up in church. As he grew into a teenager and into a young adult, the main character, Blake Rayne, resembles Elvis Presley from his looks, to the way he sings, and even the way he moves! There is a good reason for this, too, as my husband looked him up after we watched the movie to find that Mr. Rayne is a former Elvis impersonator, having won an Elvis impersonator contest in 1998. (Check out his Facebook page here.)
As we watched this movie, we imagined Elvis and his first beginnings as an artist. With his passion for different music, rockabilly, to the way he moved his body, we imagined Elvis in the early days before he became a superstar!
Later in the movie, we began to see more of the twin brother that remained with the parents and went on to stardom. The movie tied in with a twist that you will not want to miss!
Don’t worry! We don’t believe in ruining the movie by telling you how it ends. There will not be any “spoiler alerts” here. Instead, what we would like to do is to offer you a chance to enter a giveaway to win a copy of The Identical.
If you are interested, please enter our giveaway below! Please, share it with your friends and family members, any one in your network that you think may enjoy this movie.
Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post. Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.
Winter Jam 2015
The lights, the music, the Christian superstars … they all fill the stage for a night of powerful, moving, and Christ-honoring music! Are you ready for Winter Jam 2015?
My family and I first attended Winter Jam with our church a few years ago. We all piled into the big church bus and made our way an hour to Columbia with excitement building the entire way there. Although we arrived early, the line was wrapped around the building! People came from several cities away to hear and see all that Winter Jam had to offer.
I remember seeing Francesca Battistelli for the very first time live on stage that night. What is especially cool is that years later, I came to know Francesca’s mother on a personal level as we co-lead an (In)Courage group together. Awesome, right? I used to love hearing stories about “Franny,” as her mom often referred to her, and the grandchildren.
That night we also saw Tenth Avenue North live on stage. My daughter and I were a part of an interpretive movement group at our church, and we ministered through several of their songs. By Your Side is one of my favorite songs by them, and although many years have passed since we performed sign art to this song, I still remember the movements and go right along with the song whenever it comes on the radio.
We were also introduced to Toby Mac that night and were amazed by his Christian – sometimes rap style – music. Later, our church performed a few hip-hop numbers to his songs. He is still one of our favorite Christian artists today.
Ah, what fond memories!
We are looking forward to Winter Jam again this year as Francesca Battistelli is back! She will be bringing her powerful voice to the stage along with other artists in the line up such as: Skillet, Jeremy Camp, Building 429, Family Force 5, Newsong, For King & Country, Blanca, About A Mile, and Veridia, with speaker Tony Nolan. What’s better than all of these artists in one night on the stage? You get all of these Christian artists, the powerful, Christ-honoring and glorifying music and stage show, all for the price of $10!
Unbelievable, right?
But, It’s true!
This is the best concert around, and you just can’t beat the price!
The Winter Jam tour kicked off on January 2, 2015, and they are coming to a city near you! Interested? Check out their cities and tour dates here.
Make Them Feel Welcome
It matters how you treat people! Make them feel welcome! Whether it’s in your home, at your church, if they are new to the school, or a new employee on the job.
There is a famous quote that talks about how people will forget what you say, and people will forget what you do; however, people will never forget the way you make them feel!
This is so very true.
I remember how it felt a few years back upon entering a huge church with a congregation full to capacity. You’re already anxious about being out of your comfort zone, yet you forge ahead with sweaty palms, almost wringing your hands as you scan the room hoping for a friendly smile, a warm “Hello” … something, anything to show that you are being welcomed into the church. If you don’t feel welcome, the chances of you returning are slim to none.
This was the first impression we had upon attending a church years ago. Despite not feeling welcome at all, except by the preacher that went out of his way to greet us after the service, we continued going back week after week in hopes that we would finally fit in. While that never happened, we stuck it out and even volunteered to be on a committee. We became a part of the GROW team with emphasis on greeting people and making them feel welcome when they stepped foot into the church for the very first time. What greater feeling could there be than to feel welcome into the family of God and to experience the love that Christians are supposed to have one for another?!
It matters how you treat people.
It matters how they feel when they are in your presence.
It matters when you make people feel welcome!
I’ll never forget the incredible welcome I received when meeting my internet friend of 17 years in September of 2014. Debbie, who was fighting breast cancer at the time, welcomed us into her home. I felt as giddy as a school girl as our vehicle came to a stop in front of Debbie’s house. As quickly as I could, I gathered my gift bags and started making my way as calmly as possible to her front door. She was anticipating our arrival, and when she opened the door, immediately the squeals of “Oh my gosh … oh my gosh” were spoken through smiles a mile wide. We had our arms outstretched before we were even close enough to embrace. Now THAT was an incredible welcome! One I truly will never forget. Sadly, my friend lost her battle with cancer in November of 2014, just two short months after finally having the privilege of meeting her in person.
Thank you, dear Debbie, for the most amazing feeling in the entire world when you welcomed me into your home. Years earlier we welcomed each other into our hearts, and although you’re no longer on this earth, you’re still in my heart. I carry you with me, sweet lady. Thank you for the gift of 17 beautiful years of the greatest friendship I’ve ever known.
Join us weekly for Five Minute Fridays over at Kate’s virtual house.
On A Cold January Day
One of my greatest blessings came to me on a cold January day. It was the year 1997, and I was pregnant with my darling angel sent straight from Heaven above.
Feeling a little scared, but more excited than anything, we made our way to the hospital where I would be induced at 5:30 A.M. I did not mind what was to come, although I was in labor all day and into the night. Why, you may ask? Because I knew that after the labor pains subsided, I would hear the most beautiful sound; the cry of my first born daughter.
But … she had a surprise in store for us all!
At 10:26 P.M., she came into this world without a single sound. Not a peep was heard out of my darling newborn.
Fear and panic set in as the medical team worked to clear my daughter’s airway. Having just seen the movie The Hand That Rocks The Cradle did NOT help the feelings welling up inside of me. (If you’ve watched it, you’ll recall the scene I’m speaking of!)
Oh how I wanted to hold my daughter!
My blood pressure began to drop, and the medical team then began to worry about me as well. I remember crying and saying, “I just want to hold my baby … can I hold my baby …” as the nurses were getting ready to take my baby out of the room.
Finally, the doctor demanded, “Let her hold her baby!! Now!”
This beautiful 5 lb. 15 1/2 oz. baby girl was placed into my arms, and something wonderful happened. Not only did our bond solidify at that moment in time, but my blood pressure increased at a rate that the doctor said he’s never seen before.
I held my baby, smiling as I looked into her deep blue eyes and knew what was meant by love at first sight.
Ah, but in reality, I loved her way before then! I loved this little baby from the moment I found out I was pregnant. I love her still, and I always will!
It is so hard to believe that this little bundle of joy has grown from a little girl with blonde hair bouncing around the house to a brilliant, talented, and gorgeous young woman!
Ladies and gentleman, my daughter is an adult now!
Whoa …
I need a moment after letting that sink in.
She is no longer a baby but a grown woman!
Wow.
And it seemed to have happened over night, too.
On that cold January day 18 years old, an angel came to save me. And that she has! No matter what has happened in my life through these years, with a long, grueling divorce, to losing my sister in the most heartbreaking way possible (suicide), having a ruptured ectopic pregnancy resulting in the loss of one of my tubes and my chances of getting pregnant again reduced to 50%, to bullying that took place at the hands of coworkers, to remarrying but then having a bit of a rocky year in 2014, my angel has always been there – rock solid and as strong as ever giving me all of her strength in those beautiful blue eyes of hers and in those loving arms that would wrap around my neck tightly. All is right in the world when my daughter smiles at me and says, “I love you, Mommy!” Yes … even at age 18 she will occasionally still call me Mommy.
Oh how I love her! This little baby turned toddler, running around in all of her childlike wonder, leaped into her teenage years where she sought her independence, and is now dragging her heels not wishing to become an adult just yet but having no other choice as she turns 18 years old as the clock strikes 10:26 P.M. tonight.
God, thank you for sending me one of your angels straight from Heaven. Thank you for allowing me to be her mother and for us to form a beautiful family unit when I remarried the love of my life when my darling was four years old. She didn’t have to come from a broken home after all, and she didn’t. We became a family in 2002, and tears fill my eyes as I think of my husband getting down on one knee on her level to present her with a beautiful ballerina necklace as part of our wedding ceremony to symbolize the family unit. Dear Father, thank you for allowing me, despite the ruptured ectopic pregnancy and the odds stacked against us, to deliver another beautiful blue eyed miracle baby in 2004 to complete our family. Oh God, how I thank you and praise you for the many blessings in our lives – the greatest blessings that I call my daughters. Please continue to keep Your Mighty Hand upon them and keep them safe. We love them so much, and we love you, too, Jesus. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to raise this angel on earth. Amen
How To Be A Modern Gentleman
Today I would like to share my thoughts on how to be a modern gentleman. In the world today, people rush here and there, never really taking the time to care about those that cross their paths during the course of a day.
My wife, Shirley, has spoken on being intentional in the past. I’d like to add my thoughts below for this topic in particular. Just how do you show that you’re a gentleman? By doing the following:
`Greet people politely. Treat your wife and children better than anyone else in your day.
`Always open the door for your wife and children.
`Be punctual. It does not make the person feel good to have to wait on you all the time.
`Keep your word. Do what you say/ follow thru with your intentions.
`Leave the place better than you found it.
`Put your cell phone away!
`Have fun. You don’t have to be so serious all the time.
`Don’t hold on to the negatives of the past.
`Don’t assume or accuse.
`Pray for yourself and others. Seek God in all things.
`Don’t brag or boast.
`Be authentic.
`Have eyes for only her.
`Make your wife feel like a queen every chance you get.
`Discover her “love language” and do things that speak directly to her heart.
`Make reservations or plans. While it’s nice to be spontaneous at times, it makes her feel special if you thought it out in advance and planned things just for your wife.
`Give her your jacket if she’s cold.
`Don’t be a pig at the table. Wait to start your meal and wait to finish together.
`Pull her seat out for her at the table.
`Rise from your seat when she enters the room.
`Listen with empathy. This is very important as women as big on communication.
`Compliment her often but be sincere about it. Don’t use “cookie cutter” phrases. Mean what you say.
`Say please and thank you. Using your manners is still “in” these days.
`Watch your mouth and your language.
`Control your temper. Don’t let it control you!
`If you are mechanically inclined, fix things around the house without being asked. She won’t have to “nag” if you just do it!
`Pay attention to details.
How Are You Doing?
Today is the sixth day of January. As we’re making our way into the new year, I wanted to stop to ask just how are you doing?
If you had high hopes as you rang in the new year for changes that you wanted to make during the new year and may have fallen short already on those changes you were doing to make, take heart! The year is still relatively new, and you can ALWAYS start again! So you had great intentions to eat healthier and blew it just a few days in. That’s okay. Get back up, dust yourself off, and start eating better today! If you planned on drinking more water but substituted sodas or tea instead, focus today and decide that today will be your day to drink more water.
You CAN do this!
If you haven’t stepped foot into the gym, that’s okay, too. You can exercise at home. Just DO it, as the Nike commercial says. Get off of that couch and walk to the beat of your favorite song. Even if you’re walking in place, that is still exercising. Grab a couple of cans of beans in your pantry and do some curls while you’re making dinner. Or, my personal favorite, grab your honey and dance to your favorite tune!
Try not to focus so much on having “failed” so early on in the new year. It’s only January 6th. Begin again TODAY! Right where you are!
If you were planning on saving more money this year, pay day is coming at the end of the week. Sock some money away right off the bat into your savings account. If you get into a habit each week, pretty soon, you won’t miss the money that you’re putting away for a rainy day. Maybe you’re planning on saving money for that dream vacation, or you’re more practical and want to save it for new tires on your car. Whatever you are saving for, start this week. If you wanted to start with the first pay period in the year but missed that, just start now!
How about this? A gratitude jar! Doesn’t that sound interesting? Instead of beating yourself up already on what you’ve failed to accomplish in this new year, turn your focus on positives that have happened or that you’ve achieved since the clock struck midnight on December 31st/January 1st! I bet that will make you feel a lot better if you think back and begin writing down good, positive, encouraging things for the past six days. DO it! Save those slips of paper and store them in your gratitude jar so that at the end of the year you can open that baby up and read all the goodness that this year held for you. Or, if you are having a really bad day later in the year and need a little pick-me-up, open that jar and pull out a handful of things that happened earlier in the year that made you feel GOOD! It will get you back on track.
I’ll be honest. This post was as much for me as it was for you. I’ve not exercised like I had planned. My daughters will be my accountability partners, though! We’ve already discussed it! I’ve tried eating better, and I have tried drinking more water. But we all fall off the wagon at times. I am making better food choices, and I feel good about that. I would like to encourage you to just stop beating yourself up! Just get back on track. I’ve wanted to start saving more money this year, and I will … beginning this pay period.
AND … I am most definitely going to go back over the past six days and write things down that have spoken to my heart in this new year. Things that have made me smile, that have warmed my heart. Things that I will want to hold on to and remember.
I will begin today.
YOU CAN, TOO!
Now We Return To Our Regularly Scheduled Program
My children were off for two weeks for the Christmas holidays. The great thing was that this year I was able to be home with my children for the two week break! While I love my job, I love my children more and looked forward to the time at home with them.
We did a lot of talking, connecting, reading, watching movies, and sleeping in! My husband was able to take off a good bit of time with us as well, although not the entire two weeks. We went horseback riding every chance we could when there was good weather. We went riding on the property behind ours (33 acres – with the owner’s permission), down the dirt roads where my parents live out in the country, as well as going to a 2100 acre forest dedicated for equestrian usage, and also rode our horses on the beach twice! It was great fun!
We built a fire and roasted marsh mellows while saying goodbye to things of the past that were weighing us down by tossing pieces of paper into the fire with those things that we needed to let go of once and for all. That was freeing!
My family and I spent quality time together, which we always love.
We gathered with other family members during the holiday season as well as our friend from Illinois that visited at the beginning of the month to kick the Christmas season off right.
Lots of Christmas songs were heard and sung as we remembered the real reason for the season – the birth of Christ, our Lord!
Then as the Christmas activities came to an end, we ushered in a brand spanking new year! Woo Hoo!! Good riddance to 2014 – and a big ole Southern howdy and welcome to 2015! We look forward to many good times and wonderful memories that will be made this year.
And now we sit here preparing for the return to school and work. My daughters have already groaned a few times, but now we return to our regularly scheduled program.
It is nice to have a break, but we do need to return to a normal routine. And so, we shall, but we will go back to school and work feeling refreshed and renewed as we prepare for great things to come!
Feeling Forgotten
In December of 2014, I joined a group that took encouragement from the computer screen to your home mail box. It was a way to reach beyond the blog posts and social media. Having never done anything like this among bloggers before, I was excited.
The idea was to send Christmas cards to people in your assigned group. The groups were relatively small, with about six to seven women.
I went out and purchased my cards, and I had the list printed with all of the names and mailing addresses. I was ready to begin, and I looked forward to writing my thoughts and sharing my favorite bible verse in the cards that I was going to mail.
There were deadlines as to when the cards should have been mailed by, and I made sure to have mine prepared and out in the mail promptly.
At the end of the first week, I received my very first snail mail card from this group! I was very excited and made sure to carefully open the envelop and slide the card out to read all of the goodness that it held inside. This person took great care in visiting my blog prior to penning her words on the card as evident by what she shared. That meant so much that she took the time to do this. She got to know me by visiting my blog and reading in the “About Me” section first before she ever formed her thoughts to put inside of that card. What made it more special is that her maiden name was the same as my last name, so it felt like some where out there we could have been long lost relatives. Maybe that is a long shot, but it did make me smile when I read what she had written.
She took the time, put forth the effort, and made me feel special with what she wrote in that card!
I was encouraged and felt really good about this group.
The second week, I got out my cards again and prayed over the lady that would receive the card. I included my favorite bible verse yet again because it is powerful and means so much. I was hoping it would mean that much to the recipient as well.
I checked my mail box that week waiting for another beautiful card from a precious lady in this group.
Nothing came.
Week three, I did the same routine as before in preparing to mail my card to the next person on the list.
Again, nothing in my mail box this week.
I was beginning to feel forgotten. I did not like this feeling.
Still, I continued in sending my cards and blessing the one that would hold it in their hands.
Week four and then week five came and went with nary a card in my mailbox.
I learned a lesson. Just because I did everything I was supposed to do or need to do in order to participate, that did not ensure that others would reciprocate. Sure, they were “supposed” to as well, and they knew the instructions and what they had signed up for when they signed up. However, no more mail came from the group.
I realize that it was a busy time of year as everyone was involved in the spirit of Christmas, trying to find that perfect gift for their loved ones, making delicious recipes, baking cookies, and attending Christmas parties and church functions.
I believe in extending grace, too. Yet, week after week, I could not shake this feeling. I even thought perhaps it may have had something to do with where I was positioned on the list, as I was the very last one. The instructions were to start with the one above you until you circled around on the list to get everyone, even if that meant the first person on the list circled to the last person and the second on the list went to the first on that first week only to then circle the next week to the last on the list. Maybe the instructions were “clear as mud” thus the reason I only received one card. Yet, the ladies on the list were all intelligent enough to follow even those instructions.
Finally, I reached out to the admin of the group. She said she didn’t think it had anything to do with where I was on the list but that people were busy. She suggested that I could even write in the group mass Facebook message about it, and after careful consideration, I did but in a way that wasn’t insulting to those that did not include me when they mailed their cards. Instead, I thanked the one person that did take the time and put forth the effort to include me and make me feel special the moment I opened her card.
What I have learned from this is that it is so easy to get offended by what people do or do NOT do as in this case. However, my worth and value does not come from whether people remember me on a snail mail group listing or not. When I was feeling forgotten, I turned to God who never ever forgets about me. He loves me so much that He died on the cross to give me eternal life.
If I ever get discouraged with things of the world or people of the world, it only takes me shifting my focus and remembering who has me in the palm of His hand, and that, my friend, is Jesus Christ!
Sure, it would have been nice to have been included in the group and to have received the cards from others. However, even when that did not happen, I did my part, and that is all that I could do. I was not in control of others. I was only in control of myself. If I did what was required of me and went above and beyond, I need not feel forgotten. Instead, I needed to shake it off and go forth in the knowledge that God will never leave me nor forsake me. I am His, and He loves me. He knows every single hair on my head. He knew me before I was formed in my mother’s womb. And that … THAT is a great feeling!
If you have felt forgotten before in life … or maybe you’re feeling that right this very minute and can relate to how I was feeling, too … will you shift your focus just as I did toward God? He will take these feelings that threaten to overwhelm you and pull you down and replace them with such peace and love, if you only turn to Him and allow Him to work in your heart and life.
Blessings to you, dear friend. You are never ever forgotten by God above!
Let It Go In 2015
There is no need to carry it with you into 2015. What is this “it” that I speak of? Heartache, pain, the hurts from the past, grudges that you’ve been holding on to, sin that you have been a slave to … any thing that does not make you a better person and does not promote kingdom growth!
By now everyone has probably either watched or heard of the movie Frozen. The song from the movie has been blasting through the airwaves on radio stations every where for quite some time now insisting that we all just “Let it go … let it go …” So, why don’t we take this advice from Disney and just
LET … IT … GO?!
Aren’t you tired of carrying that heavy baggage around with you? It has to weigh a ton with all the wrong doings that you’ve kept track of over the years. Each grudge has to feel like bricks in that bag as you drag it, pull it, some times even feeling as if you’re behind it pushing it along your journey.
Now is the time to just let go of all things that which you cannot control and cannot change. Now is the time to ask forgiveness of your sins and forgive those that have offended you in the past. Now is the time to let go of anything that you have become a slave to and that which has controlled you for so long.
Let it go in 2015!
This is a new year. Don’t carry yesterday’s garbage into this new year!
Try inhaling … and then exhaling slowly as you imagine all of the painful experiences leaving your body. That nice, deep, cleansing breath relieves stress and anxiety.
Release the negative and get ready for lots of positives for the new year!