Hope
Warning! Female issues will be discussed within this post. Do not go forward if this offends you. Bless your heart!
I have been struggling for approximately a year and 10 months. Initially, I had no idea what in the world was wrong! What I did know was that whatever it was going on with me was getting progressively worse. It got to the point last December where we were gathered around the table giving thanks to God for the Christmas meal the staff was about to partake in when I suddenly became faint. My heart was pounding, and I became extremely hot, weak, and dizzy. My family was attending this meal, and they knew immediately something was wrong. I excused myself after a few minutes of sitting quietly hoping the feeling would pass. I felt hot, dizzy, and I knew this was not normal. My family doctor did not have any available appointments, so I was put with someone in their network. THAT proved to be a big mistake and waste of money. When I went and explained my symptoms that came on suddenly, the doctor prescriped Flonase. What? Really? I questioned how this would help with ALL of the symptoms, especially when my main concern was my heart pounding all over the place. They did note that my blood pressure was high, but they shrugged it off to being nervous at a new doctor’s office. Hardly! I left that doctor’s office determined never to return. Then, I promptly made a self referral to the heart doctor in another town. The heart doctor did blood work, as well as an EKG and echocardigram. All of the tests came back fine, except the blood work. I was anemic, thus causing ALL of the symptoms I had just experienced. Finally some answers! I was put on an iron supplement and asked what could be causing the anemia. Female issues!
Fast forward to the ob/gyn appointment and ultrasound, the doctors in my home town indicated I had one fibroid causing the issues. Fibroids are generally not something to be concerned with, yet it causes a whole host of issues, including anemia! Great. The doctor here immediately went into surgery mode. That is ALL they wanted to talk about, but it wasn’t on the top of my list. They put me on a pill that made my life hell for six weeks. Finally, I took myself off of this medicine when the doctor in town did not seem too concerned or too receptive to how this was affecting my life and ability to work! Another self referral was in order! This self referral would also NOT be in my home town. I was going where they appear more knowledgeable and actually to care about their patients and their well being!
My new doctor has been wonderful. I was hesitant initially, but he took the time to thoroughly explain to me what was going on with my body, with even having models to show me in detail. I became emotional at my very first appointment with the difference in my home town doctors and these doctors. I knew right then that I was done with my home town doctors. There was no turning back. This was cemented in my mind when the new doctor ordered another ultrasound. The home town doctors had it wrong! I didn’t have just ONE fibroid … I had THREE!!!!! In addition to this, I have Adenomyosis as well. I was shocked and scared when he relayed this information to me. While they agreed to try a hard hitting, heavy medicine, there was no guarantee it would work. And, here I am to report that, sadly, it has not. Therefore, I will be having a hysterectomy in the near future. This was not something I wanted at all, not because I’m still considering having more children, because I’m not. But, no one wants to be cut on! I realize the medical field has advanced so much, but it is still scary being put under and having someone cut on you! I’m not a fan of that, especially after a ruptured ectopic pregnancy in 2003, yet another time when my home town doctors let me down by NOT seeing me when I insisted something was wrong! The results of their neglect almost caused me my life! This time the home town doctors said they’d have to open me completely up due to possible scar tissue left behind. However, this new doctor feels confident he can do it laproscopically. I pray he can!
With all of the above said, please pray that the surgery will be successful, that I will not have any complications or any problems with the anesthesia or the surgery itself. Please pray that the fibroids and everything else turn out not to be anything bad, and hopefully all of the issues I’ve had the past year and ten months will finally be resolved. I’m 46 years old with two beautiful children who need me as much as I need them. I pray God allows me many, many, many more years with them! I hope to be an old woman rocking my great-great-grandchildren in my lap on my front porch one day!
Create
My daughters and I love to gather together to create our own special masterpieces. From paint night right in our very home, to making crafts, and even branching out to attending different classes, we enjoy creating to the fullest.
What makes it so special is that we are doing it together. It’s something we have a passion for, and we’re sharing it with each other. I get such joy in my heart when I see their smiling faces as their designs and creations take life right before their eyes!
Recently, we attended a Caligraphy class together at our local fine art’s center. The girls have always loved pens, markers, etc. They literally write on EVERYTHING! They always have! Honestly, they got that from their mother! When I saw the class advertised, I feared it was too late as they had a list of people already signed up and I was too late to the game. Much to my surprise, they had a few cancelations, and my girls and I were IN! Woo hoo! We went to the class, and although it was watercolor caligraphy, that part I missed in the class description, my girls excelled in this class! I struggled with making my letters look decent, but they were doing an excellent job all the way through the entire class.
At the end of the night, we brought our cards we designed home and showed them to my husband. He always says, “Wow … great job …” even to me, when I know I didn’t do that great. I appreciate his enthusiam, though.
This creative way of writing/painting is something my girls will take with them now in life. They have already taken out their painting kits and decorated cards and letters since the class. And my heart smiles!
Tell
Receiving less than desirable news is something no one enjoys or looks forward to, but it gets worse when you tell someone about it. Often times, you do so in an effort to receive support and encouragement in a trying time. However, what happened to me this week was that I became so frustrated and full of anxiety trying to explain the situation. The person didn’t seem to understand because, quite honestly, they can’t. It’s female related, and well, I was talking to a man!
First problem.
They pressed for details, and the more I tried to explain, the more I felt invalidated with how they were making light of the situation. Why? Because it’s not THEM going through anything. That’s why.
Second problem.
Then the fear kicked in that I was being so misunderstood. I finally told him that I could not continue the conversation and felt no need to discuss the matter with him further. What I’d like them to do is consider that one day it just might be THEM with issues below the belt, and they’d want someone supporting them, not making things more difficult in an already trying time!
Lesson learned.
People, hear me. When someone comes to you with a concern, LISTEN AND BE THERE! Comfort, support, encourage. While I understand questions are asked in an effort to gather information and get a clear understanding of what is taking place, making light of something serious makes it worse! That’s like telling a woman that is upset to just calm down. Yea, try that, men folk, and let me know how that works out for you! Chances are, you will be handed your head!
It was reaffirmed, yet again, why I keep the majority of my personal business to myself.
Be careful who you tell your business to because a lot of people are just plain nosey. Others make light of the situation, when it is NOT a laughing matter. Rarely, you will find people who truly do want to be there to love, support, and encourage you when you’re going through a hard time. Treasure those people!
