Everyone gets discouraged from time to time.  The important thing is not to unpack your bags and live there.  Do not take up residence at Doom-and-Gloom Avenue.  You’re not meant to hang your hat on the back of the door at Discouragement Lane either.

Things happen, and we get disappointed.  Often times, it is due to our expectations surrounding the situation or individuals.

Recently I was disappointed about a situation.  After having done several favors to help a family member out last week, it became my turn to ask a favor from them.  They indicated their willingness to grant the favor, yet when it came right down to it, they couldn’t be bothered.

When something like this happens, it always catches me off guard.  This time was no different.  Having JUST helped them Thursday evening and finding that when Saturday came they were unwilling to help me … that just did not sit right with me at all.  I wasn’t alone in the way I was feeling either as my husband and daughter felt the same way!

It’s hard when this happens.

I’ll admit that I was upset Saturday when I realized that although I was willing to go above and beyond for them – and had proven that several times recently – there are those that are not willing to do the same for us in return.  Then a Facebook quote came to mind that went something like this:  Stop swimming oceans for people that won’t even jump a puddle for you. 

We have a giving nature about us.  If we can help any one in any way, we’re right there extending a helping hand.  Sadly, though, there are those that are unwilling to return the favor. Yet, they will call right up and ask for you to do them another favor … and that is exactly what happened!  They called last night, as a matter of fact.  Well, I’m sorry.  I’m not in the favor granting business right now after having been denied when I asked a small favor from them.  I was really taken aback that they’d have the audacity to call and ask for another favor having just denied MINE!

This is when you learn to say … no!

It’s hard … I’m not going to say that it isn’t.  It has taken me ALL of these years to be able to say “NO!” without feeling the need to justify, state my case, or just over-explain things.  My daughter hasn’t yet perfected saying no … she is new in her adult walk, and she felt guilty for saying no, so when I said no … she said she’d do it instead.  The person still got what they wanted, so I doubt they learned anything in this whole thing.  But I did.  It was a lesson learned by me and my husband.  While we’re willing to do for others, they are not willing to do for us in return.  Now I will not ask anything of these individuals, and I will not be so quick to lend a helping hand or stretch myself to the max to accommodate them as I have done many, many times in the past.

Disappointment?  Yes, I have felt such disappointment and sadness since Saturday.  I could have let it eat at me, consume me even.  I decided NOT to let it have that power over me.  Instead, I have chosen to just be still.  I have talked about it, mulled it over, and now I’ve prayed for peace surrounding this situation.  I’m willing to let it go now.  I do not wish to hold on to it any longer.

Sadness will attempt to take over when you’ve been discouraged and disappointed.  Realize, though, as I did that this is your temporary home at the moment.  Feel the feelings.  Allow them to come, and then roll it around in your head for a little while until you find some form of peace with the situation.  Ask God for help, and I promise you, He will!  Feel sad for a little while if you must – feel disappointment in them and their actions or lack thereof, but do not unpack and live there.  Usher disappointment out and happiness back into your life, your heart, and our home!

It is hard when people disappoint you, but don’t unpack and dwell there. Your feelings are just your temporary home at the moment. Feel them, explore them, and then ask God to help you move on in a better frame of mind.