I’m sure you’ve all seen the picture on Facebook that asks what you would say to your younger self in only two words. My response has been: “You matter!” and “You’re enough!”
I chose those words because in life there are so many people just waiting to bring you down a notch or two. They can’t wait to intimidate you and try to make you feel like you don’t matter. There are others that take pride in trying to make others feel small and as if they aren’t enough.
What I’d like you to realize is that the very people that are striving to pull you down and chip away at your self esteem, self confidence, and self worth are the very ones that are struggling themselves! Otherwise, why would they attack another human being? They wouldn’t! If they were happy in their lives, they would be basking in the sunlight, smiling at their beautiful lives instead of plotting evilness and spewing hatefulness. They are miserable people that do not like to see others succeed. They want to grab a hold of you and bring you down into the pit of despair that they are living in.
Honestly. Think about it. Why else would these people do it?
From social media shaming, bullying, to “indirecting” someone in a way that others that are familiar with the situation will know who you’re talking about. It’s petty and makes the person doing it look extremely small. Sadly, this happened at the beginning of the year to my daughter. All she wanted was to be left alone, but the more she tried to get away from the offenders, the harder they tried.
I like to believe that there is good in every one. As humans, and yes as sinners, we have the bad that wants to come out at times. But that is when we truly need God. We don’t have to let the “little man” get up on our shoulder; ie: the devil. We don’t have to fall victim to his schemes and do evil things to others around us. We can resist, and we should. Often times, though, certain people choose not to and that is where trouble comes in.
People want a sense of community and a sense of belonging. They need companionship. We actually crave it. However, in light of how we’ve been treated in the past, we resort to just keeping with our family unit and not allowing very many people in.
Just when we “think” we can find happiness by being involved in a group, we soon learn that not all in the group are welcoming. This happened to me yet again with a group in my town. We were bound together due to our love of horses and trail riding. We were to go on trail rides together, and I did attempt this with them twice. It resulted in me being left behind. One time it was clearly because I was on an extremely lazy horse that didn’t want to speed up. She was perfectly content to take a slow and steady pace along the trails. I can understand where this might be frustrating to others on faster horses. That being the case on this first trail ride I went on with them, I did not get offended by them going ahead. The only thing that concerned me was that I was not in a familiar area at all. I did not know my way around, and I was afraid of getting lost. The second time I attempted a ride with the group, I was on my much faster horse. The result was that while my horse kept up pretty good with theirs, at one point they wanted to run their horses. I did not want to run mine, so I stayed back. I assumed (which was wrong of me) that they would run for a bit, then wait for me to catch up. That did not happen. Instead, they rode on without me. I decided at that point in time that I would not ride with them again. This was twice now that I “thought” I was included only to find out that I really and truly wasn’t. I’m sure there will be those that will say that it was my fault because I didn’t join them in running my horse. I have a hip injury that prevents me from doing much that involves being jolted around whether it’s trotting or loping/cantering a horse. I have done it since my accident two years ago, but I prefer a nice, safe walk. We have ridden with a man and his wife that actually waited up on me before despite what the rest of the group was doing. It did strike me that he was the ONLY one to wait around on us, too. But he said out of common courtesy, that is what you do! Obviously, the rest of the group didn’t get the memo on that!
Still … trying to give people the benefit of the doubt … these same people saw my posts on Facebook about the different places we would ride, and they said, “Hey, let us know where you’re riding next, and we’ll join you.” I did just what they said, and I let them know where we were riding. I even created an “event” on Facebook for it … and guess what? No one showed up. Not a single person. So, I won’t be inviting them on any future rides. It’s not like they would come any way!
And posting in a “group” with them? Yea, the majority of the time what I wrote would be ignored.
I know that you can’t take everything so personal. I get that, and for the most part, I don’t. But when you want so badly to be a part of something and this happens … again, and again, and again … it is disheartening.
For me, I’d love to be included and to feel like I’m a part of something.
This is where everything shifts for me because I AM a part of God’s kingdom! He loves me and wants a relationship with me. He welcomes me with open arms and forgives me of my sins. He wants to hear from me, to hear my prayers and He waits for me to engage Him each and every day. He won’t ignore me. He won’t turn me away or leave me. He will always be with me and for me.
This is where you have to turn the focus off of the approval you wish you could get from your fellow man … and focus on GOD! You are HIS child, and HE loves you more than you will ever know.
If you’ve been feeling like you don’t matter … aren’t enough … aren’t included … or are often times ignored … know that the devil wants you to feel these things and have a low opinion of yourself. He wants you to be down in the dumps, to be consumed by depression, and he uses others to get to you in this way.
Will you shift your focus on to GOD, instead? Will you focus on the truth in the Bible and stand on God’s promises?
It matters not whether people include you here on Earth, as long as you are included in the Lamb’s Book of Life in Heaven! I know it hurts your feelings. Believe me, I know all about it. But rise above it like I have. Those people that try to make you feel small DO … NOT … MATTER. In the grand scheme of things, they don’t. Not to your self worth. Not to your self esteem. Not to your self confidence. Whether they acknowledge you or not. YOU MATTER … YOU ARE ENOUGH!
And at the end of your life, that is all that will truly matter as God ushers you into the gates of Heaven and welcomes you home.