Brace yourself! I have a confession to make. Are you ready?
Confession: I read Fifty Shades of Grey.
There. I admitted it.
Now before I start losing readers left and right, allow me to explain why.
There is a lot of hype in the media about these series of books and now the movie that is coming out around Valentine’s Day. While men have feasted their eyes on pictures and videos of pornographic images for a million years, I guess society thought it was high time that women were introduced to this level of what some are calling erotica. Truth be told, though, it was in all of the Harlequin Romance Novels way “back in the day.” I was not a fan of those romance novels, though. I would rather live the fairy tale in real life with my husband instead of read about some far fetched, over reaching fantasy land where the knight and shiny armor comes riding in to save the damsel in distress … and they have mad, passionate sex in the middle of it all. I don’t want to read about the perfect guy that will romance you and sweep you off of your feet because truth be told, there is no such thing as the perfect guy. They might come close, but no cigar. But what I do know is that I have the guy that is perfect for me: my husband!
I guess you could say that curiosity killed the cat. I bought into all of the media hype and had to find out for myself what all the hype was about! So, I bought the first book on my Nook Color. Other women had this book out as if they were flashing it around proudly as they let everyone on the beaches and by the pools know exactly what they were reading. I took a different approach as I’d rather not advertise to the world that I’m reading a “naughty” book. The only person that needed to know that I was reading this book was my husband, and yes, I was honest with him about it. I did not hide this in the darkness away from him. It was hidden out of sight from onlookers, as well as my children as I wanted to be sure that this book did not fall into their hands as it is highly inappropriate for their eyes. Being an adult, though, I did not think it would hurt to see what this book had to offer.
It is a made up story with lots and lots of material that could be quite offensive to the vast majority of people due to the content. They talk about bondage, torture, and pain being inflicted for the sole purpose of providing pleasure to the recipient. That sounds odd in and of itself, but there are some individuals that love this stuff. They don’t consider it weird or twisted. They enjoy it and find it pleasurable, but it has to be something they both consent to. It has to be something that the couple would enjoy and be interested in sharing together. Otherwise, it would violate the other. A lot of people consider this abuse or abusive in nature. It would be, if it was not mutually agreed upon and something that both parties consent to before they get started. That is hard for some to grasp. Believe me, I understand completely. I think that I tend to be a bit more open minded in this area, which will surprise the vast majority that know me especially since I appear to be a Miss Goody Two Shoes to a lot of people! Now isn’t that funny – Miss Goody Two Shoes not only read the book series, but she’s talking about it openly on her blog! Yep. I sure am!
The thing is, if this does not appeal to you – if it does not peak your interest – don’t read it and don’t go see the movie when it comes out.
For me, I was a tad bit curious what all the hype was about, so I did read the first book. I found that once I got through the first round of explicit details on their “play time,” the rest of it really didn’t impact me. I have not lead a sheltered life. I know what they are referring to, and I know that a lot of people reading those scene – yes, it could be women as well as men – could become sexually aroused if they were into this type of “scene.” Others, though, could skip right over the “raunchy” parts and focus on the story line. Ultimately, that is what I ended up doing. And you know what? When I did that, I found the book interesting so much so that when I got to the end of the first book I slammed it shut saying I was NOT going to read the rest of the books … yet found myself right back at my Nook Color within a few days because curiosity killed the cat again, and I just had to find out what happened next in the story line.
Believe it or not, this movie that shows a powerful business man completely taken by a very submissive young lady, does actually have a love story and isn’t just about sex, bondage, torture, etc. Their love story will captivate you and hold your interest so much that you will want to see what happens in the other books just as I did. I could care less about all the explicit details of their made up sex life. I wanted to find out why Christian was the way he was, and the book did dive into this. When it reached that point in the story line, I was satisfied with the money I spent because of how deep the story actually went in that direction. Further, they do live happily ever after … with a twist toward the end of the third book.
Will I see the movie when it comes out? Probably not! I read the books, and my curiosity was satisfied with that.
A lot of people are up in arms over the books as well as the movies. I say that if this is not your cup of tea, don’t read it, and don’t watch the movie. If curiosity got the best of you like it did with me, read until your curiosity has been satisfied. If you don’t want to read all the explicit details, skip over those parts in the book like I did.
There is no need to lose your peace of mind over this. Some will be for it, some will be against it. It’s all what your personal tastes are in this area.
Is it porn for women? It could be categorized as such due to the erotic nature of some of the content in the book, but to me, it is no different than the Harlequin Romance Novels. If those have been socially acceptable for years, why the uproar now with Fifty Shades of Grey? That’s the big question to me. I think that people were okay with the erotic nature of the romance novels simply because it was a tender love story surrounding the sex scenes in the books. However, the problem with Fifty Shades of Gray is the BDSM content. I think if the bondage scenes and the torture scenes of the consenting parties were not in the books or the movie that is coming out, there would not be any problem at all with Fifty Shades of Grey.
The bottom line for me is that if it doesn’t interest you, don’t read it or watch it. If you find it offensive, stay away from it.
Could the content within the books and movie cause one to stumble? Yes. It could lead one to fantasize about the characters in the books. It could also lead one to express a hidden interest in BDSM that they’ve never verbalized before. It could lead one to lustful thinking and ways. BUT … so could other things out there like the romance novels of yesteryear and the racy sex scenes on daytime soap operas. If you read the books and express your interest in the “scenes” with your spouse, and you both mutually consent, I see no problem as long as you both focus on each other and NOT on fantasizing about the characters in the book. It’s no different than reading about different sexual positions to try with your spouse. Would you say those types of self help books for couples are inappropriate? If you use those between yourself and your spouse within your marriage, I have no issue with that either.
Ultimately, it is up to you as to if you read the book or watch the movie when it comes out. But, before you listen to anyone bashing the content or before you jump on the bandwagon, realize that what interests some people won’t interest others … and that is perfectly okay! To each their own. I am not going to stand in judgement of anyone that reads or watches Fifty Shades of Grey. I caution you not to either.
That’s my two cents, for what it’s worth.